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Miami: Home of the Miami Relatives
"Tell your mother I'm going out for cigarettes."
"I hope you're not going to let your parents pass by without speaking to them."
"My, this Cabernet pairs well with your parents and the four Martinis I had at the bar."
Tags:cabernet, cabernet sauvignon, martini, martinis, wine, wines, meet the parents, meeting the parents, good impression, good impressions, first impression, first impressions, drunk, drunks, drunkard, drunkards, drunken, bad impression, bad impressions, alcoholic, alcoholics, alcoholism, boyfriend, boyfriends, introduction, introductions, husband, husbands, dinner date, dinner dates, cocktail, cocktails, nerve, nerves, nervous, nervousness, self-medicate, self-medicates, self-medicating, self-medication, wine pairing, wine pairings, in-law, in-laws, inlaw, inlaws
"Your entire family has the flu, and they won't be coming home for Christmas!"
Tags:miracle, miracles, extended family, extended families, flu, flu season, christmas, inlaw, inlaws, in-law, in-laws, holiday season, holiday seasons, stress, stresses, stressing, stressor, stressors, stressed out, anxiety, anxieties, anxious, anxiousness, merry christmas, happy christmas, family gathering, family gatherings, family reunion, family reunions, dysfunction, dysfunctional families
"Owing to an impetuous act of your Great-Great-Aunt Pumpkin's, we now have owls in the family."
"Does a new Civil War mean we don't have to go to your sister's for Thanksgiving?"
"I brought Tom home to my parents and left him there."
"Don't let my parents get to you—they hate everyone I bring home."
Tags:meet the parents, meeting the parents, introduction, introductions, introduce, introduces, introducing, in-law, in-laws, inlaw, inlaws, boyfriend, boyfriends, new boyfriend, new boyfriends, parent, parents, awkward situation, awkward situations, awkward, felon, felons, felons, perp, perps, perp walk, perp walks, cop, cops, police officer, police officers, police woman, police women, prisoner, prisoners, arrested, jailed, inmate, inmates, first impression, first impressions, bad impression, bad impressings, leaving a bad impression
"It seems like your parents are finally comfortable enough with our relationship to openly criticize it."
Tags:relationship status, relationship statuses, girlfriends, boyfriend, boyfriends, parental disapproval, disapproving parent, disapproving parents, criticism, critic, critics, in law, inlaw, inlaws, in-law, husband, husbands, wife, wives, family disapproval, disapproving family, disapproving families, family estrangement, openly critical, open criticism, open criticisms
"My wife said I had to get flowers for my mother-in-law....I don't suppose you have any dead ones laying around?"
Luna - short for Lunatic.
"My wife is constantly invading my personal space. I think she gets it from her family."
Tags:sardine, sardines, in-law, in-laws, inlaw, inlaws, in law, in laws, marriage problem, marriage problems, marital problem, marital problems, married life, married couple, married couples, bad influence, bad influences, marriage counselling, marriage counseling, marriage therapy, marriage therapist, marriage therapists, space, personal space, invasion, reynolds unwrapped
"...and exactly how long are your parents planning on staying?"
"Seven hundred wives? I'll bet he had a lot of inlaw problems?"
Tags:bible, bibles, bible story, bible stories, torah, torahs, torah story, torah stories, bible character, bible characters, torah character, torah characters, solomon, wife, wives, in law, in laws, in-law, in-laws, inlaw, inlaws, extended family, extended families, mother in law, mother-in-law, mothers-in-law, mothers in law, bedtime story, bedtime stories, king solomon
"I don't care. We're not moving back in with my parents."
Tags:polar bear, polar bears, environmentalists, environmentalist, environmental activist, environmental activists, climate change, global warming, global warming, climate-change, climate crisis, environment crisis, environmental crisis, in law, inlaw, inlaws, family life, in-law, in-laws, family-life, estranged family, estranged families, family estrangement
'Oh no! I can't remember what I forgot to bring!'
"Why do you wear that when we go to my parents?"
"Mother says we need to talk."
Tags:mother in law, mother-in-law, mothers-in-law, mothers in law, married life, married couple, married couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, interfering, interference, domineering, in law, in laws, inlaw, inlaws, extended family, marriage problem, marital problems, over-involved, conflict, conflicts, toxic, boundaries, personal boundaries, monster in law, monster-in-law
"Oh, you do it that way, do you?"
Tags:mother-in-law, cook, cooks, cooking, backseat, passive aggressive, passive-aggressiveness, in-law, in-laws, soup, soups, making soup, recipe, recipes, wife, wives, in-law, in-laws, inlaw, inlaws, control, controls, control freak, control freaks, dysfunction, family dysfunction, dysfunctional, dysfunctional families, thanksgiving, christmas, dinner, dinners, supper, suppers
"No, Sir. Your in-laws don't qualify as pest."
Tags:pest control, pest controls, pest controller, pest controllers, exterminator, exterminators, exterminating, household pest, household pests, pest, pests, infestation, infestations, in law, inlaw, inlaws, in laws, in-law, in-laws, mother-in-law, mother in law, mother-in-laws, mother in laws, family life, family-life
"All right, all right. I swear I won't argue with any of your relatives this Thanksgiving."
'Check this out. These sharp drops in his vital signs coincide with visits from his inlaws.'
"I'm sorry, Tom... but you don't Chronic Fatigue Syndrome if it only when you're going to see your inlaws."
Tags:chronic fatigue syndrome, cfs, myalgic encephalomyelitis, me, excuse, excuses, fake, fakes, faking, ill, illness, illnesses, faker, fakers, sick, sickness, disease, diseases, psychosomatic, transparent, obvious, inlaw, inlaws, in-law, in-laws, mother in-law, mothers in-law, father in-law, fathers in-law, convenient, convenient excuse, convenient excuses, extended family, dysfunction, dysfunctional families
It'll be nice to see your mother after all these years!