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Perils of Home Banking
Tags:tech, modern tech, modern technology, modern technologies, banking, online banking, bank teller, bank tellers, banktellers, bankteller, security, online security, internet security, internet banking, home banking, queue, queues, queuing, waiting in line, computer, computers, pc, pcs, modern life, modern times
"If I could pay my bills I'd pay them online if I had a computer."
'Thanks, Grandma! How do I password protect it?'
Perpetrator of a daring daylight illegal electronic transfer of funds fleeing the scene of the crime.
Tags:heist, heists, bank, banks, banking, banker, bankers, bank heist, bank heists, robbery, robber, robbers, robberies, bank robber, bank robbers, cybercrime, cybercriminal, cyber-crime, cyber-criminal, flee, flees, fleeing, scene of the crime, online banking, internet banking, mobile banking, guard, guards, bank guard, bank guards, embezzle, embezzles, embezzling, white collar crime, injustice, classism, classist, perp, perps, perpetrator, perpetrators, unequal system of justice
'He's mining for bitcoins again.'
"Well, your computer here may say I'm overdrawn, but my computer at home says I have oodles of money, so what do you say we split the difference?"
Tags:bank, banks, banking, teller, tellers, bank teller, bank tellers, cashier, cashiers, money, finances, personal finances, problem, problems, overdrawn, computer, computers, technology, splitting the difference, fair, in debt, debt, debts, owing money, bank account, bank accounts, bank statement, bank statements, overdraft, overdrafts, online banking, internet banking, customer, customers
'I made that payment a couple of days ago. The check's in the Internet.'
"I've hacked into our bank account."
A failed internet scam.
'Of course the bank didn't credit your account. You can't make online banking deposits by putting cash into the DVD slot.'
"Oh, too bad, Mrs. Taporek, the computer just ate up all your money."
'Do I LOOK like I pay my bills online?'
'You asked for your bank account balance...it just went 'poof' and dripped down to zero!'
'This ain't going too well, Paddy.'
Scary Adult Stories
'Jason feels insecure if he's too far from his money... but electronic bank statements have cured that!'
"I typed the incorrect password for my online banking so much that not only did they lock me out - they locked me up."
Tags:password, passwords, online banking, internet banking, banking password, banking passwords, jail, jails, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, jailer, jailers, incorrect password, prison sentence, jail sentence, internet security, online security, lock up, lock ups, lock-up, lock-ups, locked up
"Because I have my lunch money automatically deposited into his account."
"Apparently, the bank where I cash my paycheck just went 'paperless'."
Tags:bank, banks, extra crispy, paycheck, paychecks, paycheque, paycheques, pay cheque, pay cheques, pay check, pay checks, banker, bankers, green policy, green policies, green politics, environmental policy, environmental policies, environmentally friendly, digital banking, online banking, internet banking, digital age
"A paperless society is fine and all, but just in case, I have a couple reams of 24lb. bond stuffed in my mattress."
'Online baking is convenient but what I miss most is walking over to the bank and chatting with the tellers.'
"Haven't you heard? The world has gone to digital money. I suppose we could give you a check ... "
'Your allowance has been wire transferred to your debit card.'
Click here to view your account. Click here to view somebody else's account.