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"To be honest, I'm a little surprised the dating service matched us up."
'How do you like your egg?'
'I'm waiting for the right introduction agency to come along.'
'Short, fat, balding, palid complexion...in one.'
'Good afternoon, you must be 'Shy, Ongar'. I'm 'GSOH, Ealing'.'
"I'm sure your last introduction would have been more successful if..."