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"I'm declaring a mistrial." "Ahhh … the system works!"
Tags:court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, trial, trials, legal system, justice system, law, laws, legal, judge, judges, lawyer, lawyers, counselor, counselors, counsellors, counsellors, attorney, attorneys, solicitor, solicitors, barrister, barristers, legal counsel, defense, defence, defendant, defendants, client, clients, justice, mistrial, mistrials, invalid, inconclusive
'I'm sorry but this computer coupon is good only when printed on a color printer.'
"Good news! - I've just finished paying back my student loan...."
Tags:student loan, student loans, student debt, student debts, pensioners, senior citizen, tuition fee, tuition fees, higher education, debts, debtor, debtors, loan repayment, loan repayments, debt, debtor, pensioner, extortion, politics, care home, rest home, invalid, nursing assistant, final account, old-age
'I'm an out-of-network provider."
Puss n' scoot.
'I don't see a prospective employer having a problem with your physical disabilities...'
'You should tell the nurse your TV doesn't work.'
'Wheelchair access...I think we only do Visa or American Express.'
'All equality acts are created equal but some are more equal than others.'
"Why don't you try one before you start comparing them to oranges?"
Tags:apple, apples, fruit of knowledge, tree of knowledge, tempt, tempts, tempting, temptations, adam & eve, garden of eden, serpent, compare, compares, comparison, comparisons, comparing, apples to oranges, cliche, cliches, saying, sayings, expression, expressions, idiom, idioms, judgement, judgements, judgemental, judgment, judgments, judgmental, invalid, inaccurate, imprecise
"You wanted me to go to that small college..they've gone out of business, and me degree was recalled."
"Are you aware that your flood insurance policy has lapsed?"
'If you look carefully you'll see that all the claims are invalid except on alternate Tuesdays in June when Venus is in alignment with Mars.'
Hospital patient using his thermometer on the remote control.
Air bag on a Zimmer frame.
Injured runner being helped by an old man.
"My back goes out more often than I do..."
'I'm sure the cuts will be firm but fair.'
'The banks are costing us an arm and a leg.'
'...and please God, help me be satisfied with the illness I've alredy got.'
'I'm an equal opportunities employer, Mr Moore, but I would expect you to shave before an interview.'
'I've had a ramp installed.'
'On second thoughts I'm sure you'd make an excellent store detective, Mr Hodgson.'
'...and lately I've been having problems with my liver.' (Man's zimoframe has mini-bar attached to it).