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"Actually, Mr. Johnson, there's a big difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion."
'I have to admit ... the fist pumps are making me nervous.'
"Mr. Pumroy's horoscope says he should avoid people today."
I.R.S. Audit Division: No 'Enhanced Interrogation Techniques' are used.
'Say. . . aren't you the congressperson who headed the government audit of the IRS?'
'Kudos! Your return was almost mythological in scope.'
'Here's one piece of good news! I've been called in for an IRS audit, and I won't be able to make it.'
"Ah, Mr. Zimmerman, we meet again ..."
Accountant to man: 'I can get you a rapid refund ... and an even quicker audit.'
IRS agent to man: 'What about the money you earned from the tooth fairy back in 1975?'
"I guess we can forget about trying to get blood out of him!"