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"Besides caring too much? I'd probably have to go with Kryptonite."
Tags:superhero, superheroes, hero, heros, job interview, recruit, new recruit, recruiter, recruiting, potential employee, new employee, hire, hiring, human resources, hr, career, careers, job, jobs, work, employment, employer, weakness, what is your weakness, kryptonite, job search, job hunting, weaknesses
"Cheer up, Jimbo -- It's only a matter of time before one of those big executive searches going on out there stumbles across you."
Tags:boyfriend, boyfriends, girlfriends, husband, wife, husbands, wives, couple, couples, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, spouse, spouses, sarcasm, sarcastic, unemployment, unemployed, unrealistic, unrealistic expectations, job search, career path, careers, career, job, jobs, condescending, patronizing, patronising, nagging, nag, bother, bothering, annoy, annoying, pestering, pester
"I've stopped looking for work, which, I believe, helps the economic numbers."
Tags:unemployed, unemployment, unemployment figures, looking for work, job hunting, job hunt, job hunts, looking for jobs, job search, job searching, job seeker, job seekers, job seeking, massaging the figures, out of employment figures, data, data manipulation, economic figures, economic numbers, unemplyment numbers, given up, give up
The Tooth Fairy looks for temp work.
Tags:myth, myths, legend, legends, tooth fairy, tooth fairies, employment, seeking employment, unemployment, job search, temp work, temporary work, business, personnel, hr, h.r., human resources, hr company, hr companies, human resource company, human resource companies, recruitment, recruiter, recruiters, recruitment agency, recruitment agencies, interview, interviews, applicant, applicants, candidate, candidates, cv, c.v., curriculum vitae, resume, resumes, job, jobs, hiring, qualified, qualification, qualification, experience, previous experience, pickpocket, pickpockets, stealing
The world's most unemployable family
Tags:family, families, parent, parents, child, children, career, careers, job, jobs, work, employment, employable, unemployable, unemployment, useless, useless career, useless degree, dead-end, handwriting analyst, handwriting analysts, art, artist, artists, repairman, repairmen, appliance repairmen, appliance repairman, door-to-door, door-to-door sales, sales, salesman, salesmen, door-to-door salesman, door-to-door salesmen, encyclopedia, profession, professions, professional, professionals, hopeless, no hope, job hunting, job search, looking for jobs, recruiting, recruitment, impractical, worthless
"With Harry all options are on the table, including pointlessly looking for a job that doesn't exist for him anymore."
"We have very little need these days to employ a cudgel."
Tags:nomad, nomads, nomadic, modern, modernity, modern life, culture shock, wander, wanderer, hobo, hobos, homeless, interview, resume, cv, resumes, job, jobs, hob interview, work, working, job search, employ, employed, employment, employs, employer, employee, employers, employees, hr, h r, human resources, human resource, interview, interviews, interviewee, training, trainer, trainee, cudgel, cudgels, h r nightmare, unemployed, unemployment, job search, out of work, technology, old fashioned
"I'm afraid your M.B.A. loses some of its lustre in light of the fact that you were home-schooled."
Tags:m.b.a., mba, degree, degrees, master of business of administration, home school, homeschool, homeschooling, home schooling, homeschooled, home schooled, homeschooling problems, home schooling problems, education, education level, education levels, student, students, job interview, interviewer, interviewers, recruit, recruiter, recruiters, human resources, hr, h.r., employer, employers, employee, employees, manager, managers, job hunting, job search, job, jobs, work, career, careers, unemployed, unemployment, unemployable, resume, cv, c.v., proud parent, proud parents, exaggeration, exaggerated, embellishment, embellish, hyperbole, false, fake, business, business degree, university, university degree, university degrees, college, college degree, college degrees, hire, hiring, achievement, achievements
"I know you're a working dog, Angus. I just don't have anything for you right now."
"Qualifications? Hello! I've only spent the last six years running a huge multinational ferris wheel."
''Travel the world teaching crass, shallow and exploitative American-style consumerism.' Hey, I could do THAT!'
"It means taking a healthy pay cut, but my dad has decided to stay at home and lock himself in the basement."
Tags:family, families, work, world of work, unemployed, unemployment, job search, pay, gallows humour, dark humour, dark humor, black humor, black humour, gallows humor, pink slip, laid off, quit job, resign, resignation, resign from work, recession, children, basement, hermit, mid life crisis, hide, neet, home office, home offices, depression, depressions, depressing, mid-life crises
Day one, post grad
Tags:postgrad, postgraduate, postgraduates, undergraduate, undergraduates, undergrad, graduate, graduates, new grads, grads, new graduate, new graduates, graduation, graduated, education, college, colleges, university, universities, bachelors, masters, ma, mba, phd, doctorate, doctorates, degree, degrees, job, jobs, work, career, careers, profession, professions, real world, employment, job search, job hunt, job hunting, looking for a job, after graduation, recruit, recruitment
"You're desperate - I like that."
Tags:interview, interviews, interviewing, interviewee, interviewer, interviewers, interviewees, recruit, recruitment, recruiter, recruiters, job, jobs, job search, career, careers, job recruiter, job recruiters, corporate recruitment, corporate, hiring, hired, hire, hiring manager, hiring managers, unemployed, unemployment, desperate, desperation, need work, application, applied, resume, cv, credentials, skills
"We're down to two potential hires: you and an efficiency algorithm on a Malaysian server barge."
"I'm looking for a position where I can slowly lose sight of what I originally set out to do with my life, with benefits."
Tags:career, career path, careers, career paths, job, job market, interview, interviews, recruit, recruiter, recruiters, recruiting, recruitment, job search, dream job, dream career, dream jobs, dream careers, benefits, employee benefits, employees, employee, employment, recruitment agency, passion, passionate, mundane job, giving up, gave up, give up, settle, settled, career goals, life goals, loss of ambition, ambition, ambitions
"This is a very impressive manifesto."
Tags:job, jobs, work, worker, working, employ, employed, employment, employee, employer, employs, unemployed, unemployment, job search, application, applied, apply, job application, resume, resumes, cv, cv, good cv, good resume, bad resume, bad cv, what not to do, not to do, hr, h r, human resources, human resource, personnel, manifesto, manifestos, politics, political, political manifesto, recruit, recruiting, recruitment, recruits, recruiter
"Tom, it's come to my attention that you're trolling for a better job, using your company computer."
We don't have any vacancies for people to 'pierce the heart of a virtuous maid with the arrow of desire'...have you thought of about working in a call center?
'Someone important is bound to see my resume now!'
'It's a little chilly in here. Throw another batch of resumes we have on file in the fire.'
How to choose...
'We were very impressed by your resume. Especially the part where you mention that your grandfather is our CEO.'
'...the job is so much harder when you don't know what you are doing.'
"I'd like one of those careers where you make a six-figure income while wearing a T-shirt and sweatpants."
Tags:recruitment, recruiter, recruiters, recruiting, recruitment agency, recruitment agent, recruitment agents, career, career services, job placement, job placements, no dress code, dress code, internship, internships, job search, unemployment, employee, employees, employability, career, careers, business casual, casual, business, businesses, professional, professionals, comfort, comfortable