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"We don't have job titles here. Not only that, we don't even use our names. Actually, I don't even work here. To be honest, this is probably all a dream."
Tags:workplace, workplaces, informal workplace, informal workplaces, laid back workplace, laid back workplaces, new starter, new starters, new job, new jobs, dream job, dream jobs, dream, dreams, dreaming, too good to be true, job title, job titles, interview, interviews, job interview, job interviews
"I said I'm an astronomer, not an astrologist!"
Tags:astrologist, astrologists, astrology, astronomer, astronomers, astronomy, astrophysics, astrophysicist, astrophysicists, stargazer, stargazers, star-gazer, star-gazers, starsign, starsigns, star sign, star signs, pseudoscience, pseudosciences, pet peeve, pet peeves, hobby, job title, job titles, con, cons, scientist, scientists, psychic, psychics, fortune teller, fortune tellers, fortune, fortunes, horoscope, horoscopes
Back to The Present - I
Tags:bored, bore, bores, boring, paper pusher, paper pushers, office drone, office drones, work, works, worker, workers, escapism, escapist, desk, desks, office desk, office desks, blockbuster, blockbusters, summer blockbuster, summer blockbusters, title, titles, job title, job titles, present, presents, middle manager, middle managers, middle management, listless, doldrums, office job, office jobs, white collar job, white collar jobs, dissatisfied, dissatisfaction, summer movie, summer movies
"I'm really excited about this opportunity, but I'm hoping there's room to negotiate the title? What about 'Rises-to-the-Occasions-Mary?', or 'Cool-Under-Pressure-Mary?'
Tags:mary, virgin mary, gabriel, angel gabriel, angel, angels, message from god, messages from god, nativity, nativity story, birth of christ, christianity, title, titles, job title, job titles, impressive job titles, embarrassing job titles, negotiate, negotiates, negotiation, promotion, opportunity, opportunities
"Tell me, what did you do in real life?"
'The man who manages the man who manages the man who manages the man who manages the worker.'
"I'm in my third day of trying to figure out which little square I am."
Tags:org chart, org charts, organisational chart, organisational charts, organizational chart, organizational charts, company structure, business structure, management structure, complex, complexity, complex business, complex company, businessman, businessmen, businessperson, businesspeople, chart, charts, graph, graphs, position, positions, job title, job titles
"I suppose we have Judge Judy to thank for all this."
"Darby, Bandit, Piper & Spike - Dogs."
Tags:dog, dogs, dog lover, dog lovers, dog owners, dog owner, dogs, business, businesses, solicitors, solicitor, dog lawyer, dog lawyers, lawyer, lawyers, professionals, door, door plaque, door sign, dog names, dog name, door, doors, job title, job titles, job description job descriptions, family pet, family pets
"What I feel I do is create elegant solutions for problems that don't exist."
Tags:offices, office worker, office workers, office job, office jobs, problem, problems, solution, solutions, if it isn't broke, waste of time, wasting time, pointless job, pointless jobs, pointless career, pointless careers, job description, job descriptions, job title, job titles, pretentious, pretension, pretentiousness, conceit, conceited, self respect, self-respect
"In five years, I see myself with the same job title, about the same salary, and significantly more responsibilities."
Tags:business, businessman, businessmen, businesswoman, businesswomen, office, offices, office life, employee, employees, worker, workers, personnel, hr, h.r., human resources, recruitment, recruiter, recruiters, interview, interviews, applicant, applicants, candidate, candidates, job, jobs, hiring, job interview, job interviews, interview question, interview questions, where do you see yourself in five years, job title, job titles, salary, salaries, money, income, finances, responsibilities, promotion, promotions, modern life
Tags:coordinator, coordinators, office assistant, office assistants, secretary, secretaries, waiting room, waiting rooms, title, titles, job title, job titles, job, jobs, patient, patience, wait, waits, waiting, visitor, visitors, visiting, visit, visits, guest, guests, guest coordinator, guest coordinators
'Formerly, the office of the CFO.'
A single man has the job title of CEO, Business Manager, HR, Undermanager, Head of Division, Personnel. . .
'We have one hunter and one gatherer... Everyone else is a consultant.'
'It's just a temporary title until the staff gets to know you.'
'OK ladies and gentlemen, when I start the music start circling the chairs. When the music stops please take up your new post...'
"For God's sake, Parker, there are twenty-three of us vice-presidents in the company! Stop with this 'heartbeat away' garbage!"
Tags:vice president, vice presidents, company, companies, job title, job titles, mislead, misleads, misleading, overinflate, overinflated, importance, sense of importance, self-important, self-importance, exaggerate, exaggerates, exaggerating, conflate, conflates, conflating, business role, business roles, brag, brags, bragging, braggart, braggarts, boast, boasts, boasting
"I'm afraid we have no Grand Panjandrum as such. What we have is a Mr. Kemnitzer."
Vice President in Charge of Block
"Why have you called the new post 'assistant deputy administrative project support?" "Because it sounded better than 'skivvy'."
Rhonda P. Clewson- Cat Person
Tags:cat person, cat people, cat, cats, pet cat, pet cats, pet, pets, offices, office worker, office workers, office door, office doors, titles, title, door, doors, catflap, catflaps, cat flap, cat flaps, mad cat woman, mad cat women, pet door, pet doors, cat owner, cat owners, pet owner, pet owners, job title, job titles
'You push! I don't need to give you a job description.'
"Does this desk make my job look big?"
Tags:job, jobs, position, positions, work, offices, title, boss, bosses, status, promotion, promotions, fashion, fashions, world of work, make my butt look big, advice, advise, advising, opinion, opinions, vanity, executive, executives, fashionista, desk, desks, status symbol, status symbols, job title, job titles, show off, boast, boasting, brag, bragging
Department of Urban Expansion and Development