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'But APART from increased profitability, better customer support, enhanced margins, reduced stress and improved staff morale WHAT is the POINT of all this emphasis on increased PRODUCTIVITY?'
'The good news is that we've created six new jobs...and the better news is that they're all yours.'
"We've discovered an Earth-like planet capable of sustaining an unemployment rate similar to our own."
'You don't need a union. I'll take care opf you.'
Labour Force Survey Shows Increase in Part Time Working.
'Studies show more people are living into their 90's and we're smarter.'
'Our corporate culture is simple. We hire energetic young folks like you, then exploit them with low wages, long hours and mind-numbing projects until there's nothing left but dried-up shells of existential regret.'
"I used to kick butt and take names. Now I can't pronounce the names and the butts are overseas."
'It was so embarrasing. I was replaced by ten humans.'
Jobs Inc: In and outsource.
'I heard rumours you're outsourcing my job to India.'
'These are on special offer... buy one get one free.'
'Somehow my job stayed home and I'm on my way to China...'
'If my job is moving to Mexico, I'm moving with it!'
'So you're here to discuss your wages?'
'That's what comes of employing unpaid interns.'
Every scab should have a dog.