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"Let's bark at nothing."
"Of course, if you want a dog that will rescue you from drowning, that's another story."
"Write what you know.""Bark, bark, bark. Tennis ball, squirrel."
The emotional rollercoaster of a lab
"They were, sitting around the dinner table, knocking off a bottle of Côtes-du-Rhône and blathering about the Middle East – you've never heard such shallow, simplistic reasoning in your life – and one of them turns to me and says, "And what do you think, Barney? What do you think we should do?' and all I could come up with was 'Woof'. I felt like such an ass."
Tags:dog, dogs, dog owner, dog owners, dog lover, dog lovers, labrador, labradors, dinner party, dinner parties, dinner conversation, dinner converstations, drunken conversations, drunk conversations, middle east crisis, middle east peace process, talking dog, talking dogs, woof, pretentious, pretentiousness, regret, shame, embarrassment, social anxiety
"Selective breeding has given me an aptitude for the law, but I still love fetching a dead suck out of freezing water."
The emotional rollercoaster of a Lab
"The labs are back."
"Here. We promised you a big lab."
Tags:dog, dogs, lab, labs, laboratory, laboratories, labrador, labradors, dog breed, dog breeds, scientist, scientists, scientific breakthrough, scientific breakthroughs, job offer, job offers, sweetheart deal, research facility, researcher, researchers, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, misunderstood
'I think he's a cross between a Labrador, Retriever, a Poodle, and a chow because he retrieves his poo and chews it.'
Hungry labradors online.
Tags:labradors, labrador, labrador retriever, labrador retrievers, yellow lab, yellow labs, cookie, cookies, website cookie, website cookies, double meaning, double meanings, homograph, homographs, dog, dogs, dog lover, dog lovers, appetite, appetites, big appetite, big appetites, treat, treats, snack, snacks, hungry, laptop, hungry dog, hungry dogs
"Doris, cancel my three o'clock."
'No more yard clean up with this breed. He's a lavatory reliever.'
Nobody Fails Labrador Masterchef
Tags:cookery show, cookery shows, cooking show, cooking shows, cook, cooks, lab, labs, labrador, labradors, dog breed, dog breeds, dog breeding, canine, canines, pet, pets, pet dog, pet dogs, dog owner, dog owners, dog behaviour, dog behavior, canine behaviour, canine behavior, foodie, gourmand, gourmands, gourmet, gourmets
"She got promoted. She's now the Labrador receiver."
"Ha, ha! He thinks he's a person!"
Tags:dog, dogs, dog lover, dog lovers, dog owner, dog owners, lab, labs, labrador, labradors, doctor, doctors, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, operating theatre, operating theatres, operating room, operating rooms, pointing and laughing, point and laugh, pointing out the obvious, explaining the joke, explaining a joke
"Your labs are fine."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's offices, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, vet, vets, veterinarian, veterinarians, animal doctor, animal doctors, vet clinic, vet clinics, animal hospital, animal hospitals, veterinarian clinic, veterinarian clinics, animal, animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog, dogs, canine, canines, dog owner, dog owners, test, tests, lab test, lab tests, laboratory test, laboratory tests, medical testing, result, results, lab, labs, labrador retriever, labrador retrievers, labrador, labradors, wordplay, word play
"I turned him into a Labrador Receiver."
Tags:satellite signal, satellite signals, satellite dish, satellite dish, dog, dogs, canine, canines, pet, pets, pet dog, pet dogs, cone, cones, collar, collars, tv signal, tv signals, television signal, television signals, labrador, labradors, retreiver, retrievers, dog breed, dog breeds, man's best friend, reynolds unwrapped
Dogs texting each other emojis
"While your resumé said one thing it's come to our attention that labradors actually shed quite a bit."
"Guilty of something. I can just tell."
Tags:court, courts, courtroom, courtrooms, judge, judges, judgement, verdict, verdicts, guilty, guilt, guilty verdict, prejudice, biased judge, biased judges, prejudiced judge, prejudiced judges, dog, dogs, guilty dog, guilty dogs, dog owner, dog owners, dog lover, dog lovers, lab, labs, labrador, labradors