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They were sad when they found out their Grandfather had died in an earthquake.
"I don't want to leave anyone or anything a goddamn cent!"
Tags:take it with you, taking it with you, rich, riches, wealth, wealthy, wealthy elite, wealthy elites, elitist, elitists, elitism, greed, greedy, selfish, selfishness, inheritance, inherit, inherits, inheriting, will, last will and testament, write a will, writing a will, lawyer, lawyers, 1%, privilege, privileged
Cow's Last Will and Testament.
Tags:cow, will, bequeath, last will and testament, probate, beef, burger, steak, red meat, inherit, inheritance, farm, butcher, dinner, food bank, ribs, brisket, shank, rump roast, roast beef, butcher’s chart, choice cuts, deli, farmer, moo, steer, heifer, bull, leather, death, dead, die, meat industry, meat
"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."
Tags:inheritance, inherit, inherits, unwanted inheritance, will, wills, last will and testament, mother, body, body image, negative body image, self-esteem, low self-esteem, traits, trait, genetic trait, genetic traits, bad trait, bad traits, look alike, mother daughter relationship, mother daughter, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, daughter, daughters, disappointment, disappointed, jowl, jowls, arm flab, gender sterotype, gender stereotypes, death, dead, loss, rotten inheritance, bad inheritance, unwanted traits, unwanted trait, worst trait, worst traits, dna
"And to whom do you wish to leave the bulk of your estate, sir?"
Tags:inherit, inheriting, inheritor, inheritors, beaver, beavers, pet beaver, pet beavers, will, wills, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, will and testament, last will and testament, leaving a will, leaving money, estate, lawyer, lawyers, pointless, pointlessness, wasting money, waste of money, pet lover, pet lovers, animal lover, animal lovers
"Says here he leaves behind a wife, two children, and forty-seven Twitter followers."
'He kept changing his will. In the end, it all went to legal fees.'
'I'm making out my will. Is there anything you want me to leave to you, other than debt?'
'I, Jackson Kluck, being of unsound mind, spent it all on therapy.'
'Your uncle left everything to Charity... So far we haven't been able to locate her.'
'She left everything to her cats.'
"Miss Petrie dines here with Mister Burton every Wednesday evening as a condition of Mister Burton's will."
'What's the succession of power if anything happens to Grandma?'
William Shakespeare makes the first living will
"It's been awful for business, Mrs. Schultz, but it was Charlie's last wish."
Tags:last wish, last wishes, butcher shop, butcher shops, corpse, corpses, cadaver, cadavers, meat, meats, butcher, butchers, butchering, will, last will and testament, unnerve, unnerves, unnerving, scare, scares, scare away, scares away, scaring away, customer, customers, vegetarian, vegetarians, vegan, vegans, small business, small businesses, meat counter, meat counters, carnivore, carnivores, meat lover, meat lovers, meat eater, meat eaters
"Apparently the will was typed up wrong and UCLA got all your husband's money...and you get his brain!"
'And to my teenage grandchildren, I leave my unused phone minutes.'
"And to my nephew Scott, bold denier of climate change, I bequeath my north shore bungalow."
Tags:will, wills, last will and testament, last will and testimony, estate, estates, heir, heirs, heirloom, heirlooms, will reading, will readings, inherit, inheritance, nephew, nephews, uncle, uncles, irony, ironic, property, properties, beach house, beach houses, beach home, beach homes, climate change, global warming, climate change deny, climate change denier, deny, denier, climate change denial
'Yes, it all comes down to quality of life. An inheritance sure would help.'
"Im curious about your dependent children. I believe their names are Scamp, Scruffy, Flop, Spunky, and Lady."
Tags:dependent, dependents, will, wills, will and testament, last will and testament, dependent children, dependent child, dog, dogs, dog lover, dog lovers, dog lady, dog ladies, irs, tax, taxes, tax write-off, tax write-offs, exemption, exemptions, internal revenue service, tax fraud, fraud, fraudulent, fraudulence, fraudulent claim, fraudulent claims
"And to my Cousin Ernie I leave my leisure suit."
Tags:cousin, cousins, leisure suit, leisure suits, suit, suits, favorite suit, favorite suits, favourite suit, favourite suits, will, wills, last will and testament, inherit, inherits, inheriting, inheritance, inheritances, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, representative, representatives, tacky, tackiness
Doctors Without Boundaries
Tags:death, dying, mortality, sick, sickness, terminal, doctor, doctors, medical, medicine, hospice, hospices, last words, last rites, hospital, hospitals, materialism, rude, rudeness, last will and testament, inheritance, stuff, things, palliative care, bedside manner, bedside manners, malpractice, inappropriate
'It states in his will that if he becomes brain dead he wants to go unplugged.'
Tags:will, wills, living will, living wills, advance directive, advance directives, medical decisions, advance healthcare directive, last will and testament, brain dead, brain death, vegetable, vegetables, vegetative state, vegetative states, relatives, guitar, electric guitar, acoustic guitar, unplugged, concerts, rock and roll, rock music, performance art, performers, aging rock stars, death, dead, dying
'He took it with him.'
"Aare you sure this is what he meant by a quiet funeral?"