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"Not one crummy Valentine."
"Mr. S. Claus, North Pole. Dear Santa:"
"Dear Santa, Enjoy the fat-free cookies, although you don't strike me as health-conscious."
Dear Santa- Thanks for the awesome gift! p.s. did you know cellphones have built-in calculators? p.p.s. you suck.
"What do I want for Christmas? Hell's bells! Didn't you get my letter?"
Computer screen says 'Have you been naughty/nice?' Santa says to elf: 'The kids send very few letters since you set up that website.'
Bobby's dyslexia was about to bring him big trouble
Santa, please take a photo of yourself with our presents so I can post it on my Facebook. Thanks! XOXO
"Dear Santa, I was very good and my brother was very naughty. So you can just give me his presents this year."
"Dear Santa, I just want one simple thing for Christmas this year. Your schematic for building an aerodynamic time-traveling toy sleigh."
'Dear Santa, I want a super plasma intruder. One that blows fire and eats people and destroys citys!!!!! Jimmy. ps Have a merry Christmas!
'See, there are thousands of letters, all starting with 'Dear Santa'... Aren't Humans strange?'
'-and don't forget your mobiles tomorrow - we shall be texting Santa!'
Dear Santa, Tia Carmen is in the hospital. We don't know what's going to happen. You can keep all my presents this year. Just let us have Tia Carmen home for Christmas. Gracie.