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"You cannot have helped but notice the concerned expression on my face. This is because of some news I have to report."
This is News Six reporting from the New Jersey Turnpike. Southbound traffic is at a standstill. Now back to the newsroom.
"This is Larry Hawkins, …. On the lawn …... Outside your house."
"I know what some of you are thinking. You're thinking, 'Ha! He claims to be coming to us live, but he's really on tape.' Well, if that's what you think, I can only say I feel sorry for you."
"Stretch it, we're running short."
'Is this live broadcast or delayed?'
"...and now...coming into view...the first man ever to climb this treacherous mountain!"
'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'
'Must be that new 3D football.'