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"In my day, people died."
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"Those once-in-a-lifetime events are beginning to add up."
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"No booze, no red meat, easy on the carbs... I've given up living so I can live longer."
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'It's easy to understand why people are living longer today...When the Grim Reaper calls he gets an answering machine!'
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"You could try watching your diet or getting more exercise – but you'll just be delaying the inevitable."
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"I knew if I started dating again so soon he'd flip out."
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