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"Oh, Lord! Now we're getting resumes along with the Chinese menus."
Tags:business, businesses, small business, business owner, business owners, resumes, resume, cv, curriculum vitae, employment, employer, employers, employee, employees, unemployment, urban, flat, flats, apartment, apartments, chinese food, chinese food menu, menu, menus, food, foods, takeout, takeaway, delivery, restaurant, restaurants, fast food, marketing, advertising, advertisement, advertisements, ad, ads, mail, mailbox, junk mail, mailer, mailers, flyer, flyers, c/v, c/vs
"Hold it! I only look like Norman Mailer."
"Occupant, apartment 5C: Congratulations—you may already have won the all-electric Colonial split-level house of your dreams...."
Tags:split level house, split level houses, occupant, occupants, occupancy, apartment, apartment dweller, apartment dweller, junk mail, mailer, mailers, mail, post, posts, monster, monsters, split-level, split-levels, real estate, real estate agent, real estate agents, dear occupant, colonial style house, colonial styles homes
Mail and Air Mail Boxes.
"It says, 'Congratulations! You've been chosen as a finalist to be King of England.'"
Tags:congratulations, congratulate, congratulating, england, englands, king of england, junk mail, mailer, mailers, next in line, throne, thrones, sweepstakes, you may already be a winner, mail, mails, circular, circulars, royal, royals, royalty, finalist, finalists, scam, scams, royal family, royal families, royalty
'It's a tramp stamp.'
"Do we want a time-share on Two-Tree Island?"
'We understand you were involved in an accident that wasn't your fault.'
Tags:cold-caller, cold-callers, cold caller, cold callers, mailer, mailers, ad, ads, advert, adverts, advertisement, advertisements, junk mail, nuisance, nuisances, inescapable, car insurance, frivolous lawsuit, frivolous lawsuits, lawsuit, lawsuits, legal culture, accident, accidents, car accident, car accidents, desert island, bottle, message, ship, sink, disaster, claim, parasite, parasites, claims, ambulance chaser, ambulance chasers, lawyer, lawyers
The Voice-Mail Box
Tags:voicemail, voicemails, voice-mail, voice-mails, mailbox, mailbox, postbox, postboxes, post office box, post office boxes, junk mail, mailer, mailers, circular, circulars, winner, winners, winning, you may already be a winner, deceive, deceives, deceiving, deception, deceptions, deceptive, soliciting, solicitor, solicitors, solicitation, no soliciting, nuisance, nuisances, annoyance, annoyances
You are already a loser.
Disaster strikes in Utica, N.Y., when 10 people become wedged in a mailbox as they attempt to mail their taxes by midnight on the 15th.
Tags:tax, taxes, taxing, taxed, mail, mailed, mailing, mails, mailer, mailers, wedge, wedged, wedges, wedging, stuck, trapped, traps, trapping, trapper, trappers, disaster, disasters, mailbox, mailboxes, mail box, mail boxes, letter, letters, post, posts, posting, posted, deadline, deadlines, close to home
"Here's the deal. I'll buy lots of stuff from you online if you stop sending me catalogs through the mail."
Tags:catalogs, catalog, catalogue, catalogues, junk mail, junk mailer, junk mailers, mail, post, posts, online retailer, online retailers, harass, harasses, harassing, harassment, offer, offers, mailer, mailers, mailing, mailings, negotiation, negotiations, negotiate, negotiates, negotiator, negotiators, bargain, bargains, bargaining, bargained, negotiated
'Good news! You've been approved for higher limits on your credit card.'
"Hey...I'm dumping this box of old junk out on the curb!"
Return to sender.
A man on a desert island gets a flyer reminding him to vote.
"Oh, the usual bills and a friendly reminder from Satan that there's a special place in Hell reserved just for us, but only if we ACT NOW, blah, blah, blah."
Tags:hell, satan, devil, religion, special place, special place in hell, mail, advertising, advert, advertisement, mailer, reserve, reserved, reservation, afterlife, death, marketing, direct marketing, direct mail, bill, bills, afterlives, hades, devils, billpayer, bill-payer, bill-payers, billpayers, advertising technique, advertising strategy
Tags:writer, writers, journalists, journalism, reporter, reporters, journalist, newspapers, newspaper, literary figure, literary figures, inspiration, inspirations, inspired, ernest hemingway, norman mailer, arthur koestler, writing, mailer, hemingway, koestler, inspiration, literature, role model, role models, inspirations