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"I majored in the humanities but I never really got it."
"How old is a Major?"
Tags:major, majors, military rank, military ranks, officer, officers, age, age gap, age gaps, dating, date, dates, stupid question, stupid questions, silly question, silly questions, dumb blonde, dumb blondes, steroetypes, stereotypes, gender stereotype, gender stererotypes, naive, ingenue, 1940s high society, 1940s, vintage, vintage cartoon, vintage cartoons
"Let me try mine. It's made in China."
Tags:airline pilot, pilot, army, personnel, decorated, decorated officer, officer, official, armed forces, sergeant, corporal, major, general, generals, door, doors, card, key card, keycard, key cards, keycards, made in china, quality, manufacturing, manufacturing quality, quality assurance, lock, locked, locked out, technology, tech, security, secure, quality check, qa, q a, q.a, build quality, chinese industry, industry, china, chinese, american industry, industrial, mass produce, mass produced, mass-produce, mass-production, industrial superiority, made in america, made in, american manufacturing, manufactured, manufactured in america
Oliverachy - Short-lived political system where leaders were chosen by how many olives they could fit in their mouths.
"Although it may be a simple procedure, keep in mind that it comes with the risk of being billed for a major operation."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, clinic, clinics, doctor's office, doctor's office, medical, medicine, doctor, doctors, patient, patients, health, health care, healthcare, bill, bills, money, medical bill, medical bills, medical costs, cost, costs, expenses, expensive, medical billing, procedure, procedures, simple, small, major, major operation, major operations, major surgery, major surgeries, surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, risk, risks, risky, dangerous, danger, dangers, keep in mind, health insurance, universal healthcare, universal health care, socialised medicine, socialized medicine, socialised healthcare, socialised health care, socialized healthcare, socialized health care, medicaid, medicare, obamacare
The most embarrassing day in the history of the Swiss army.
Tags:swiss, switzerland, army, armies, knife, knives, embarrass, embarrassing, embarrassment, embarrassments, ran out, run out, unprepared, soldier, soldiers, general, generals, major, majors, sergeant, sergeants, captain, captains, toothpick, toothpicks, adapt, adapts, adaptable, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
'I'm switching my major to 'rehab', so I can meet celebrities.'
"I'm a social scientist, Michael. That means I can't explain electricity or anything like that, but if you ever want to know about people I'm your man."
Tags:social scientist, social scientists, electricity, social study, social studies, social sciences, anthropology, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, knowledge, major, majors, bachelor's degree, ba, bas, sociology, sociologist, sociologists, anthropologist, anthropologists, archaeology, political science, useless knowledge, useless information, scientist, scientists, hard science, hard sciences, dad, dads, father, fathers, parent, parents
'You're kidding... I've got a masters in philosophy too!'
"I didn't know you had a minor."
Tags:hat, hat joke, hats, cap, caps, cap and gown, grad, graduation, graduate, graduated, college, college degree, degree, uni, university, educate, educated, education, educates, educating, teach, teaching, major, major minor, minor, graduation cap, sight joke, visual joke, visual gag, sight gag, mortar, mortar board, mortar boards, board, boards
"And then after high school, I spent twelve years in college and majored in procrastination."
'I'd like to change my major from electrical engineering to English or something.'
"This is where you end up when you had a humanities major in college....I should have gone with poli-sci!"
Tags:college degree, college degrees, humanities degree, humanities degrees, career path, career paths, career, careers, career advancement, career advancements, uni, unis, university, universities, humanities, major, tacos, end up, humor, political-science, majors, political science, political sciences
'You can't take the Ethics course-you're a Political Science major.'
'I'm majoring in political science and minoring in ballet - I want to be a spin doctor.'
'So, in college what did you major in' - 'Business poetry.'
"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."
Tags:uni, university, universities, college, colleges, major, majors, minor, minors, study, studying, degree, degrees, liberal arts, bachelor's degree, master's degree, phd, doctorate, associate's degree, student, students, college degree, student loan, student loans, courses, academic, academics, undeclared, unemployment, unemployed, graduates, graduate, unemployed graduate, no experience, entry level, job, jobs, entry level jobs, career, careers, career services, better luck next time
Cave College: 'We offer two majors, Hunting and Gathering.'
It ain't half Hoffman.
'At law school I majored in law of the jungle.'
Student Loan Shark
Tags:student loan, student loans, loan shark, loan sharks, major, majors, philosophy major, philosophy majors, student debt, student debts, debt, debts, debtor, debtors, loan collection, loan collections, loan collector, loan collectors, poor, job prospect, job prospects, owe money, owes money, owing money, student, students, college, colleges, university, universities, degree, degrees, undergrad degree, useless, worthless
'I think I made A Major mistake.'
"My human majored in 'business' management."
'I majored in ethics. Several recruiters talked to me. They'd like me to do volunteer work.'
"Beat it! Here comes the major and his entire staff!"
Tags:musical score, musical scores, musical notations, major note, major notes, musical notation, military rank, military ranks, reynolds unwrapped, boot camp, boot camps, major scale, major scales, major chord, major chords, major, majors, rank, ranks, army, armed forces, training camp, training camps