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'Okay, so his hair is gone! But look how great his SKIN looks!'
'Yes, I have both a law and a medical degree. If you sue me for 'malpractice', I'll sue you for 'slander'.'
'My client never claimed to be a veterinarian, your honor. He claimed to be an animal doctor.'
'How's my Surger? Call 1-600 Lawsuit.'
'Okay, we'll play 'Doctor'...let's cut through the chase...I'm an attorney, and I sue you for Mal-Practice!'
'Do you think my husband would have better than a 50-50 chance if you didn't wear your mask up so high?'
Litigation Advice: 'Miss Beamish, in this office never, ever, say 'accidents will happen'...'
First Brain Transplant: Claim for gross negligence.
Student to biology teacher: 'Dissecting? Couldn't we get sued for malpractice?'
'I never believed in reincarnation before, but look, that Snyder case we put to sleep - it's come back as a lawsuit.'
'As a guideline, if you charge half as much per hour as your attorney charges you, you'll earn the same gross income, if you work twice as many hours.'
"Well, ungrateful human patients SUE their doctors. Mine just kick and bite!"
'The surgeon got a little carried away with your foot transplant.'
'Maybe we shouldn't have used the tail as the donor site for a skin graft.'
'I think you'll eventually believe in reincarnation, Doctor. My dog is coming back as a law suit."
'But I told you I was going to do a radical ear resection!'
'We decided to recall our new drug because it causes lawsuits.'
'Oh for God's sake you baldy dimwit, I thought our last meeting had eradicated your inferiority complex!'
'Medical Malpractice vs Just Compensation'