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"Bummer. Let's try the castle down the road."
"That's one more reason not to like him."
"It's such a beautiful day. Why aren't you out looting or burning something down like a normal kid?"
"The sharks around here like spices on their food."
"I can't believe we fell for it again."
'The hook was too dangerous.'
"How the heck could you forget your sword?"
"Potpourri air freshener? Who's the wise guy?"
'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'
"Good news, folks! Your village is now eligible for our aid program. Just fill out these forms."
" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."
"Whose idea was it to pillage a zen garden?"
"I thought by now that somebody would've invented a way to order loot from home and have it delivered."