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Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'
'This would be a lot easier, Miss Reed, if you didn't require such pinpoint accuracy.'
'My class can't wait to start multiplication. I made them sign a pledge never to use it for evil purposes.'
Tags:teacher, teachers, students, curriculums, math lesson, math lessons, maths lesson, maths lessons, math class, math classes, maths class, maths classes, student, education, opposition, curriculum, lie, lies, lying, liar, liars, teachers, students, pupil, pupils, class, classes, wrong, teaching, challenge, challenging, gifted, special, disrespect, pupil, pupils
'Add the numbers, divide by how many numbers you've added and there you have it-the average amount of minutes you sleep in class each day.'
'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'
"What does any of this have to do with football?"
Tags:football, football player, football players, jocks, students, pupil, pupils, math teacher, math teachers, maths teacher, maths teachers, math lesson, math lessons, math class, math classes, maths lesson, maths lessons, maths class, maths classes, jock, student, teacher, math class, school, jersey, algebra, equation, math question, math problem, athlete, school sports, black board, chalk board
'How do we know this won't lead to budget deficits and subprime mortgages?'
"No, it's not a gray area."
"But it's not as wrong as it could have been."
"Can I carry the remainder over to the next question?"
Tags:math class, math classes, maths class, maths classes, maths lesson, maths lessons, maths teacher, maths teachers, math teacher, math teachers, math lesson, math lessons, students, teacher, student, school, remainder, remainders, homework, math problems, math questions, long division, multiplication, show your work, leftover, carry over
'What is a fifth part of a foot?'
"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."
'Rather than learning how to solve that, shouldn't I be learning how to operate software that can solve that?'
'I'm no rocket scientist, but I think the answer is four.'
'My maths tutor complained about me? Hasn't she heard of mentor-client privilege?'
'Division is just like addition except you have to use a different button on the calculator.'
'I see now! You're talking apples and I'm thinking oranges!'
"Jesus could probably work this problem. He was good at working miracles!"
Counting part time employees is the new math.
Boy on psychologist's couch: 'I have a fear of heights and long division.'
Calculator: Counting by fingers.
"Arithmetic doesn't agree with me."
Tags:report card, report cards, report, reports, school report, school reports, schooling, grade card, grade cards, grade, grades, grading, fail, fails, math lesson, math lessons, maths lesson, maths lessons, math class, math classes, maths class, maths classes, arithmetic, math, maths, mathematics, excuse, excuses, kid, kids, student, students, pupil, pupils
"I'm not taking cookies, I'm practicing my counting."
Tags:cookie, cookies, cookie jar, cookie jars, biscuit jar, biscuit jars, biscuit, biscuits, kid, kids, family life, family-life, childhood, mom, moms, mother, mothers, counting skill, counting skills, excuse, excuses, math lesson, math lessons, maths lesson, maths lessons, math class, math classes, maths class, maths classes