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"You make me want to be a better person than you."
Tags:choice, choices, restaurant, restaurants, dinner, eating out, out to eat, dining, fine dining, waiter, waiters, foodie, foodies, food lover, food lovers, date, dates, first dates, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, better, better person, self, self improvement, improving, improve, improvement, betterment, self betterment, self image, persuade, persuading, pretentious, pretentiously, self love, jealous, jealousy, competitive, competition, backhanded, backhanded compliment, insult, insulted, insulting, rude, rudely, mean, foot in mouth
"Her fried squash blooms were leathery."
Tags:food, dinner party, dinner parties, party, parties, guest, guests, comment, comments, critical, criticising, criticizing, criticism, critique, critiques, putting down, squash, squash blooms, squash bloom, cuisine, cooking, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, homecooking, home cooking, home chef, home chefs, homemade, cooking at home, complain, complaint, complaints, complaining, rude, ungrateful, ingrate, ingrates, leathery, chewy, fried, unkind, jealous, jealousy, envy, envious, catty, mean, unappreciative
"You make me want to be a better man, Olivia. Then maybe I could find somebody else."
Tags:choice, choices, restaurant, restaurants, dinner, eating out, out to eat, dining, fine dining, waiter, waiters, foodie, foodies, food lover, food lovers, date, dates, first dates, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, better, better person, self, self improvement, improving, improve, improvement, betterment, self betterment, self image, persuade, persuading, pretentious, pretentiously, self love, jealous, jealousy, competitive, competition, backhanded, backhanded compliment, insult, insulted, insulting, rude, rudely, mean, foot in mouth, as good as it gets, married life, marriage
"I figured you'd end up looking like that."
Tags:aging, ageing, aged, growing, growing old, growing older, retirement, old man, old men, retiring, retires, retired, retiree, ugly, ugliness, change, changes, changing, posture, good posture, bad posture, overwork, overworked, over work, over worked, married life, marriage, married, couple, couples, old married couple, bicker, bickering, insult, insulted, i told you so, hate to say i told you so, wife, wives, mean
"I'm not getting a flat-screen TV til something better comes along."
Tags:tv, tvs, flat-screen tv, flat-screen television, flat-screen tvs, flat-screen televisions, new technology, old techonology, technological advancement, technological advancements, old model, outdated, old, obsolete, made obsolete, obsolete technology, stingy, penny-pincher, penny-pinching, frugal, mean, luddite, luddites, pub, pubs, bar, bars
"Please, Todd. You always pick up the check. Let's Bolt."
"I've passed your complaints along to the captain."
Tags:cruise, cruises, vacation, vacations, holiday, holidays, tourist, tourists, tourism, travel, traveller, travellers, travelling, traveler, travelers, traveling, voyage, voyager, voyagers, sea travel, sea, ocean, boat, boats, ship, ships, cruise ship, cruise ships, staff, crew, crewman, crewmen, captain, pirate, pirates, mean, angry, complaint, complaints, complaining, customer service, service, cruise line, cruise lines, pirate ship, pirate ships
Iced drink antidote
Hecklers On Poetry Night
Tags:writer, writers, novel, novella, novels, novel writing, poem, poet, poetry, poets, poetic, literature, literary, word play, play on words, ironic, irony, author, authors, authored, book, books, book lover, writing, should be writing, you should be writing, manuscript, artistic, artist, artists, art, arts, heckle, heckler, hecklers, heckling, nastiness, mean, meanness, metaphor, metaphors, term, terms, terminology, metre
"...and you!? Did you like yours?"
Tags:dining, dinner, lunch, chef, waiter, waitress, server, servers, customer service, restaurant, dinner date, gun, guns, gun control, gun safety, gun laws, murder, murderer, death, dying, dead, kill, killing, killer, unstable, angry, mean, bad meal, bad server, bad chef, shooting, shot, shoot, threat, threatening, restaurant review, restaurant reviewer
'I said... SPEAK UP!'
"I'm sorry you're having a hard time, Roy. Please forgive my Schadenfreude."
'Outta my way, you little puke!'
Tags:surf, surfing, surfs, surfed, surfer, surfers, brat, mean, bully, bullies, bullying, wipeout, wipe out, wiped out, wipes out, water sport, water sports, waves, beach, wave, role reversal, inverted, thug, insult, insulting, insults, walking frame, zimmer frame, frame, frames, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
"Who was cruel enough to tell you about the flap?"
Expensive Bird Feeder
Tags:capitalism, capitalist, capitalists, bird feeder, birdfeeder, bird-feeder, bird feeders, birdfeeders, bird-feeders, wild bird feeder, birds, bird, wild bird, wild birds, aves, consumerism, consumer, consumers, trick, trickery, captive audience, money slot, coin slots, money slots, coin slot, animal, animals, nature, wildlife, greed, greedy, selfish, mean, coin, coins, poor, penniless, hungry, hungry, impoverished, poverty, starving, starvation, food bank, food banks, foodbank, foodbanks, basic right, basic rights, uncharitable, miserly, unkind, inconsiderate, thoughtless
"Gee, I don't know—does it really say Christmas?"
A dog getting neutered.
"Tell them to go to hell, but in a nice way."
"I don't want to remember her like this. I want to remember her for the mean thing she said in 1981."
Tags:death, dead, funeral, funerals, funeral service, funeral service, wake, wakes, memorial, memorials, memorial service, memorial services, casket, caskets, coffin, coffins, dead body, dead bodies, corpse, corpses, mourn, mourning, mourner, mourners, bereaved, grieving, remember, remembering, remembrance, remembering the dead, memory, memories, mean, mean comment, mean comments, comment, comments, petty, grudge, grudges, holding a grudge, resentful, resentment, bitter, relationship, relationships, family, families
What we talk about when we talk about the weather
'What I like most about the new boss is that you always know EXACTLY where you stand with him!'
How to deal with rude customers.
"My composition is called 'Mrs. Torrence Is a Big Fat Idiot.' "
Tags:teaching, teacher, teachers, public, public school, public schools, new teacher, new teachers, mean, meanness, nastiness, kid, kids, child, childhood, mean kid, mean kids, rush limbaugh, limbaugh, composition, school, schools, schooling, surprise, inflammatory, hack, paper, papers, homework, assignment, assignments, hack journalism, baseless, politics, political, politician, politicians, book, books, bookish, book worm, book lover, book lovers
"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"
"You really just want to watch me punch myself in the face three times?"
Tags:genie, genies, wish, wishes, wishing, happy, happiness, content, contented, smug, smugly, smugness, punch, punches, punching, sadism, suit, suits, sleazy, sleaze, mean, meanness, nastiness, hurt, hurting, waste, wasted, wastes, satisfaction, satisfied, power, powerful, lamp, lamps, smug, smugness