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'A large Federal study published in the New England Journal of Medicine found that large federal studies don't prove anything.'
"Now there's a study that says laughter isn't the best medicine."
"That's strange. We don't have any back issues of the Chriopractic Journal."
Tags:chiropractor, chiropractors, chiropractice, back injury, back injuries, back problem, back problems, chiropractic, journal, medical journal, medical journals, medical library, pun, puns, journals, library, doctor, files, librarian, librarians, back issues, back pain, back copies, spinal, filing
'Here's an interesting article. 'Cold or Seasonal Allergy?''
Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.
"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall."
Tags:patient, patients, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, medical student, medical students, med student, med students, rounds, doing rounds, bored, boring, short attention span, short attention spans, attention span, attention spans, rare disease, rare diseases, medical journal, medical journals, bedside manner, illness, illnesses, rare illness, rare illnesses, lose interest, losing interest, hospitalized, hospitalization, hospitalize, in hospital
'I can't believe my own parents snooped through my medical journal.'
'There could be a medical journal article here. Your hospital progress chart and your investment portfolio are exactly the same.'
"I'm going to give you a bunch of literature about insomnia. Start reading it at bedtime and you'll be asleep in no time."
"Good news! I'm upgrading your condition from medical journal article to letter to the editor."
"It looks like beer could ward off Alzheimer's."
'Your condition is being upgraded from a medical journal article to a letter to the editor.'
'There's nothing in the medical literature about it. I think you're just supposed to change back spontaneously.'
'I'm sorry, but there are now 16,000 medical jounals, and I no longer have time to see any patients.'
'Oh, stop making faces. Six glasses of wine per day happens to be recommended by the Las Vegas Journal of Medicine.'
'Oh, stop making faces. Twelve beers per day happens to be recommended by the Las Vegas Journal of Medicine.'
'If this doctor can't keep up with the latest magazines, how can he keep up with the latest medical journals?'
'Henry, there are two schools of thought about your illness: The New England Journal of Medicine school and the National Enquirer.'
May 13, 2005: A fly appears to be driving the patient even crazier.
"Hang on, there was something in last week's 'Lancet'."