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"...Nobody likes a whiner."
"You broke your leg? Hey, it's not the worst thing that can happen."
"Use your fingers."
"No, he can't go home. Not until the green in his face turns two shades darker."
"Your boss called to say since you are having surgery, he'll only require you to work a half day today."
"The doctor is on medical leave. Diagnosing your hypochondria gave him repetitive stress syndrome."
"I'm taking some time off to get away from the stress. See you in ten years."
"But you just had an annual checkup two weeks ago"
"No need to rush back to work. The office lad is doing your job."
"Don't worry Doc, I don't need a doctor's certificate, I don't work: I'm a drone..."
'The doctor is on medical leave. Diagnosing your hypochondria gave him repetitive stress disorder.'
"I can't come in today, I'm feeling like myself."
'I discovered just as much work gets done when you're not there.'
'You threw your back out? Well, run out and retrieve it!'
"Did I miss a lot of work while I was out with the flu? No, I didn't miss it at all!"
"He won't be in today. He's fighting some kind of a bug."
"I received 9 months leave for an injury at work, then 6 months to recover from junk food poisoning while watching TV at home."
"Any chronic conditions we should be aware of?"
Tags:job interview, job interviews, hr, human resources, personnel, job candidate, job candidates, job applicant, job applicants, chronic condition, chronic conditions, health problem, health problems, medical problem, medical problems, chronic health problem, chronic health problems, sick day, sick days, sick leave, medical leave, medical leaves
"You're late, Barnes. And I don't want to hear the excuse that the hospital didn't release you when I called."
Tags:hospital, hospitals, patient, patients, healthcare, sick day, sick days, sick leave, medical leave, medical leaves, broken bone, broken bones, injury, injuries, worker rights, labour rights, labor rights, excuse, excuses, difficult boss, difficult bosses, difficult, demanding boss, demanding bosses, demanding, boss, bosses, manager, managers, office politics, unsympathetic, empathy
"You have to miss the meeting because you sprained an ankle? Seriously, that's the best you could come up with?"
Tags:centipede, centipedes, bug, bugs, insect, insects, wildlife, wild-life, entomologist, entomologists, entomology, meeting, meetings, sprain, sprains, ankle, ankles, excuse, excuses, sick day, sick days, sick leave, sick leaves, medical leave, skiving off, skive off, skived off, skive-off, skiving-off, skived-off
"Oh, no! Your boss enclosed your severance check in his get-well card!"
Tags:work, workplace, office, boss, bosses, worker, employees, medical, hospital, hospitals, sick, illness, get-well card, fire, severance check, severance checks, severance cheque, severance cheques, severance pay, boss, bosses, sick leave, sick leaves, sick day, sick days, fire, fired, firing, sack, sacked, medical leave, unfair, termination, dismissal
"I missed work due to a rib injury from belly-laughing at your jokes."
Tags:sycophant, sycophants, sycophancy, belly laugh, belly laughs, belly-laugh, belly-laughs, belly-laughing, joke, jokes, yes men, yes man, yes-men, yes-man, suck up, suck ups, suckup, suckups, suck-up, suck-ups, sick day, sick days, sick leave, medical leave, joker, jokers, sense of humour, sense of humor, boss, bosses, manager, managers, management
"I rang your boss. He won't accept Brexit made you sick."
"I've used up all my sick days so I'm calling in dead."
"I'm not feeling well. I'm calling in stick."
Tags:stick, sticks, sick day, sick days, medical leave, medical day, medical days, illness, illnesses, health problem, health problems, sickie, sickies, pulling a sickie, branch, branches, tree, trees, mobile, mobiles, cell, cells, cellphone, cellphones, pun, puns, word game, word games, word-game, word-games