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'I hope these make you feel better, because they're all you're getting.'
'It's out new method for determining who we should treat first. We take people in order of how loud they scream.'
'OK, Mrs. Dunn. We'll slide you in there, scan your brain, and see if we can find out why you've been having these spells of claustrophobia.'
'The FDA now requires that we have an actor show you what kinds of side effects you might experience.'
'Dang, we lost another one...maybe this whole laughter thing is a crock.'
To make taking their daily array of medicines more fun, many seniors are using the new Pill-A-Pult.
'Good morning, here's your placebo, I mean medicine... well, I'm fired.'
"I forget the name of the product, but the jingle on TV goes something like 'Ya-dee-dum-dee-rah-te-dum-dee-rah-dee-dum.'"
Woman looking at a sign in a pharmacy that says "Staff Picks"
Tags:pharmacy, pharmacies, chemist, chemists, chemist's, pharmacists, pharmacists, drugstore, drugstores, drug, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical, medicine, medicines, meds, prescription, prescriptions, over the counter, over-the-counter, prescribed, medical, staff, staff picks, staff favourites, staff favourites, recommendation, recommendations, suggestions, suggestions, drug abuse, medicine abuse, prescription abuse, pharmaceutical abuse, addiction, addict, addicts, healthcare, health care, insurance, health insurance
"Can you recommend a wine that goes well with red meat, Zanex, and Lipitor?"
Tags:wine, wines, anxiety disorder, anxiety disorders, anxiety medication, anxiety medicine, anxiety medicines, prescription, prescriptions, drug, medication, medications, medicine, medicines, sommelier, sommeliers, somelier, someliers, wine steward, wine stewards, wine menu, wine menus, recommendation, recommendations
"How long before the clinical trials are over?"
Tags:clinical trial, clinical trials, prescription, prescriptions, drug, medicine, medicines, medication, medications, cave painting, cave paintings, cave drawing, cave drawings, drug trial, drug trials, medical trial, medical trials, prehistoric, prehistory, cavemen, caveman, neanderthal, neanderthals
"It has unfortunate memory side effects. He never forgets to take the damn things."
Tags:medication, medications, medicated, medicine, medical, medicines, med, meds, mental health, side effect, side effects, anxiety, anxieties, stress, stressed, psychology, memories, memory, husband, husbands, wife, wives, relationship, relationships, couple, couples, spouses, spouse, marriage, married
'The specialist gave me this medicine for my hearing loss. He said two drops a day in my beer, but so far I haven't noticed any improvements.'
Medicine cabinets labelled for the different days of the week
Tags:medical, medicine, medicines, drug, pharmaceutical, pharmaceuticals, meds, prescription, prescriptions, pill, pills, healthcare, health care, patient, patients, man, men, medicine cabinet, medicine cabinets, bathroom cabinet, bathroom cabinets, pill box, pill boxes, days of the week, bathroom, bathrooms, washroom, washrooms, restroom, restrooms, toilet, toilets, loo, over-prescribed, over prescribed, too much, too many, medicine abuse, pharmaceutical abuse, drug abuse, prescription abuse, modern life
"Rub this on everything."
Tags:pharmacist, pharmacists, chemist, chemists, prescription, prescriptions, drug store, drug stores, drug, cream, creams, over the counter, pharmacy, pharmacies, customer, customers, customer service, rash, rashes, allergic reactions, allergic reaction, doctor, doctors, diagnose, diagnosis, medication, medications, med, meds, medicine, medicines
"I'd like some Ketamine for my appetizer. What opiate would you recommend for my entree?"
"You'll enjoy the way these interact with over-the-counter medication."
Tags:pharmacy, pharmacies, chemist, chemists, chemist's, pharmacists, pharmacists, drugstore, drugstores, drug, druggist, druggists, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical, medicine, medicines, meds, prescription, prescriptions, pill, pills, over the counter, over-the-counter, prescribed, medical, side-effects, side effects, side-effect, side-effects, interact, interactions, enjoy, drug interaction, drug interactions, patient, patients, healthcare, health care
Take one Per Day as Affordable.
"Ah! Here it is!"
'You the guy who asked for the least expensive generic alternative?'
"This one is over the counter. But, as yet, under the radar."
"Of course you feel great. These things are loaded with antidepressants."
Tags:monsters, monster, beast, beasts, dragons, dragon, dinosaur, dinosaurs, carnivores, carnivore, man-eater, man-eaters, invasion, invaded, invade, destroy, destroyed, snack, snacks, food, foods, medicine, medicines, medication, medications, medical, prescription, prescriptions, antidepressants, antidepressant, mental health, mental illness, depression, anxiety, stress, over medicate, doctor, doctors, drug, drugged, pharmaceutical, overmedicate, overmedicates, overmedicating, overmedication, over-medicates, over-medicating, prescribe, prescribes, prescribing, prescription, prescriptions
"Have you considered installing a dehumidifier?"
Tags:doctor, doctors, hospital, hospitals, medical professional, medic, medicine, medicines, fungal, fungi, fungal infection, infection, infected, infest, infested, infestation, mushroom, mushrooms, patient, patients, health, healthy, healthcare, living conditions, quality of life, mould, black mould, care, welfare, health and wellbeing, consultant, check up, check-up, checkup
"This one has the most friends."
Tags:pharmacy, pharmacies, chemist, chemists, chemist's, pharmacists, pharmacists, drugstore, drugstores, drug, pharmaceuticals, pharmaceutical, medicine, medicines, meds, prescription, prescriptions, prescribed, medical, healthcare, health care, pill, pills, friend, friends, drug interaction, drug interactions
"I went to medical school with the guy who almost came up with a cure for what you have."
Tags:doctor, doctors, md, mds, gp, gps, clinic, clinics, doctors clinic, doctor's clinics, cure, cures, medicine, medicines, false hope, medication, medications, medicate, let down, let-down, disappoint, disappointment, disappointments, dissapointed, general practitioner, general practitioners, patient, patients, hospital, hospitals, diagnosis, diagnose, taunt, taunting, tease, teasing, medical school, medical schools, medical college, medical colleges