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'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'
Boss: 'Speak up Smythe, I know you've got an opinion, I told you what it was in my email this morning!'
The Corporate Trust: 'Since we have an agreement of transparency with the feds, I don't need to remind all of you that this meeting never happened.'
'Right we need an urgent response to our productivity problems...'
'My job is to make decisions. Your job is to make them good decisions.'
'What if this time, more heads has made us more stupid?'
'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'
'And from what we've been able to determine, this is the tweak that broke the paradigm's back.'
Rock, paper and scissors fighting in office conference room.
'That's it! That's the chart we've been looking for.'
'In hindsight, I believe that our oversight was shortsighted...'
"I think I've got it-Mandela, the After-Shave."
Tags:mandela, nelson mandela, inappropriate, inappropriateness, south africa, after shave, after-shave, politics, meetings, advertising, executive, executives, conference, conferences, consumerism, consumerist, disrespectful, trends, fashion, trend, meeting, sales, selling, sold, market, marketing, disrespectful
"Ex-cuse me! We're trying to hold a meeting here."
"Where do you get off saying my kid is grade level?"
Tags:education, school, schools, schooling, teaching, teacher, teachers, student, students, classroom, classrooms, class, classes, parent-teacher conference, parent-teacher conferences, parent-teacher interview, parent-teacher interviews, meeting, meetings, kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, unsatisfied, dissatisfied, dissatisfaction, upset, angry, grade level, grade levels, marking, grading, mark, marks, grade, grades, primary, elementary, kindergarten, modern education, preschool, nursery school, childcare, daycare, modern life
"I have an agenda, Barbara, and you're on it."
"Before I continue, can we just lose the personal trainers?"
"We met when I yelled at him for running clockwise around the Reservoir."
Tags:relationship, relationships, couple, couples, how we met, meeting, meetings, chance meeting, chance meetings, romantic meeting, romantic meetings, unromantic meeting, unromantic meetings, party, parties, house party, house parties, yell, yelled, running, run, runs, running clockwise, run clockwise, run anti-clockwise, one-way system, one way
"I know we didn't accomplish anything, but that's what meetings are for."
Tags:business meeting, business meetings, waste of times, wastes of time, wasting time, time waster, time wasters, accomplishment, accomplishments, accomplish, accomplishes, accomplishing, unproductive, manager, managers, boardroom, boardrooms, boardroom meeting, boardroom meetings, meeting, meetings, corporate culture, executive, executives, corporation, corporations, faceless corporation, interruption, interruptions, interrupting, work flow, efficient, efficiency, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring
"Then it's agreed. Judgment Day, whenever it comes, will fall on a Thursday, so that they'll get the long weekend."
Tags:religion, religious, god, heaven, bible, biblical, angel, angels, judgement day, last judgement, final judgement, day of judgement, doomsday, the day of the lord, second coming of christ, business, planning, scheduling, timetable, timetables, long weekend, long weekends, timetabling, meeting, meetings, board meeting, board meetings, decision, decisions, deciding, choosing a date, deciding on a date, settling on a date, committee, committees, weekend, weekends
"I'm glad to see that almost everyone has been taking advantage of the new executive fitness center."
Tags:fitness, fit, gym, gyms, muscle, muscles, muscular, health, buff, workout, workouts, working out, weight lifting, weight lifter, weight lifers, lifting weights, exercise, exercising, board room, board rooms, meeting room, meeting, meetings, meeting rooms, office, offices, fitness center, fitness centers, fitness centre, fitness centres, coworker, coworkers, scrawny, little, out of shape, in shape, body builder, bodybuilder, body builders, bodybuilders
"I go into the meeting totally prepared and I wind up eating out of his hand."
"Does anyone second the motion to make family meetings more informal?"
Tags:family meeting, family meetings, family, families, meeting, meetings, formal meeting, formal meetings, meeting agenda, meeting agendas, meeting notes, informal, formal, informal meeting, informal meetings, father, fathers, dad, dads, mom, moms, mum, mums, mam, mams, mother, mothers, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, child, children, pendant, pedants, control freak, control freaks
"We don't call these savage screaming fits. We call them confrontational verbal interfacing."
Tags:screaming fit, screaming fits, tantrum, tantrums, unprofessional, professionalism, meeting, meetings, corporate culture, testosterone, working environment, working environments, workplace, workplaces, confrontational, verbal, communication, communications, toxic work environment, toxic working environment
'Face it, we're never going to reach a consensus.'