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"I finally have my very own place where I can do what I want in my parents basement."
"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."
"It says these pills I gave you could have hallucinogenic side effects, so just let us know if you start seeing things."
Letter from Camp* (*with Footnotes)
Teacher to parents: 'Ah - you're right. What do I know about kids? My biological clock went coo-coo years ago.'
'It wasn't premeditated.
'Maybe this isn't a good time to ask Mom for money.'
"What tipped you off?"
"...Although we have your son's diarrhea under control, he's not out of the woods yet."