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"So leaving it with a broker didn't do any good at all?"
Tags:broker, brokers, money, moneys, money manager, money managers, savings, savings account, savings accounts, stock, stocks, stock broker, stock brokers, private accountant, private accountants, treasure, buried treasure, pirate, pirates, piracy, portfolio, portfolios, interest, interest rate, interest rates, misunderstand, misunderstanding, misunderstandings, misinterpret, misinterprets, misinterpreting, interest, accrued interest
"Why no raise? Because, Fellman, we've been ?scally feckless."
Tags:raise, raises, pay raise, pay raises, pay rise, pay rises, fiscal, fiscal responsibility, fiscally responsible, feckless, irresponsible, irresponsibility, executive, executives, manager, managers, management, money manager, money managers, accountant, accountants, accounting department, accounting departments, office, offices, priority, priorities, selfish, self-interested, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies, hierarchy, hierarchies
"Be that way, Marilyn. You weren't sneering at me when I was managing your portfolio."
Tags:sneer, sneers, sneering, portfolio, portfolios, costume, costumes, dress up, dresses up, dressing up, fired, firing, firing, pizza, pizzas, mascot, mascots, costumed, recession, recessions, accountant, accountants, personal accountant, personal accountants, financial adviser, financial advisers, financial advisor, financial advisors, flyer, flyers, handout, handouts, snob, snobs, snobby, mascot, mascots, stock broker, stock brokers, broker, brokers, money manager, money managers
"I don't know how the gods feel, but sacrificing financial advisors makes me feel happy."
Tags:sacrifice, sacrifices, sacrificing, financial advisor, financial advisors, financial adviser, financial advisers, god, gods, human sacrifices, human sacrificing, volcano, volcanoes, crook, crooks, hated, hatred, hatreds, stockbroker, stockbrokers, broker, brokers, money manager, money managers, pariah, pariahs, social outcast, social outcasts, unpopular, unpopularity
'I'm just saying, relying on change under the couch cushion is a risky retirement plan.'
"Invest? No offense, but I've read about you guys."
Tags:invest, invests, investment, investments, crook, crooks, investor, investors, hedge fund, hedge funds, hedge fund manager, hedge fund managers, criminal, criminals, thief, thieves, unsavory, unsavoury, distrust, distrusts, distrusting, distrustful, money manager, money managers, stock market, stock, stocks, stocks and bonds, bad reputation, bad reputations, reputation, reputations
"You're bankrupt... That'll be $45,000 please..."
"It's good and bad news with your investments, the good is that they've gone up, the bad news is they've gone up in smoke!"
Tags:investment, investments, invest, invests, investing, pension, pensions, 401k, 401(k), retirement fund, retirement funds, financial adviser, financial advisers, financial advisor, financial advisors, money manager, money managers, bad investment, bad investments, good news, bad news, up in smoke
"It's great that you showed me how to get my 401K to roll over, but now it just plays dead."
Tags:financial services, investing, investments, 401k, pensions, retirement services, investment advisors, money, banking, stock market, stocks, money markets, wall street, financial planning, financial planners, money managers, pensioner, pensioners, retirement, retirement account, retirement accounts, retirement savings, savings account, savings accounts, roll over, rolling over
"I realized we weren't on the same page when he advised me to bury my money in the ground."
'Hoyt group: Gluttony, Lust, Sloth, Envy, Pride, Anger & Greed Management'
"This is Fluffy, my pet money."
Tags:money, pet, pets, aquarium, aquariums, fish, fishes, saving, savings, save up, saves up, saving up, accountant, accountants, accounting, investor, investors, investment, investments, stockbroker, stockbrokers, career, careers, finances, financial, financial advisor, financial advisors, financial manager, financial managers, money manager, money managers, banker, bankers, banking, capitalism, capitalist, capitalists
"You certainly are a broker. That's what you've made me."
Tags:broker, brokers, stockbroker, stockbrokers, stock broker, stock brokers, stock market, stock markets, investor, investors, investment advisor, investment advisors, investment adviser, investment advisers, lose money, loses money, losing money, lost money, poor, bad investment, bad investments, money manager, money managers
"What should you do? Here's what you should do: invent a time machine, go back sixteen months, and convert everything to cash."
Tags:economic crash, economic crashes, market crash, market crashes, time machine, time machines, financial advisor, financial advice, financial adviser, money manager, money managers, broker, brokers, stockbroker, stockbrokers, bond, bonds, savings, savings account, 401k, 401ks, 401(k), pension, pensions, bear market, bear markets, great recession, recession, recessions
"We are neither hunters nor gatherers. We are accountants."
"I think I need a professional money manager. I invest sixty five percent of my money gambling in casinos and thirty five percent I keep under the mattress."
"I think we need a professional money manager. Our investment statement is not making much of a statement."
"I need a professional money manager. The success of my investment portfolio is predicated on my winning the lottery."
Tags:money manager, money managers, money management, financial management, finance manager, finance managers, investment, investments, investor, investors, portfolio, portfolios, lottery, lotteries, lottery winner, lottery winners, lottery winning, financial adviser, financial advisers, financial advice
"Look, Miss Knepper, we're working your money as hard as possible, but right now your money is just pooped."
"So, the bills still aren't paid? You've never been good at money management."
Tags:money problem, money problems, money trouble, money troubles, financial problem, financial problems, financial trouble, financial troubles, money management, money manager, money managers, family finance, family finances, bill, bills, accountancy, balancing the books, bookkeeper, bookkeepers, bill paying, debt, debts, poor, poverty
"Do you have your financial affairs in order?"
"Yes, we can assist with upside-down mortgages!"
Tags:mortgage, mortgages, upside-down mortgage, negative equity, home equity, home financing, debt, loans, debts, bank loan, owe money, owes money, owing money, equity, home equity, underwater, homebuyer, homebuyers, home buyer, home buyers, money manager, money managers, financial planner, financial planners, financial planning, fiscal responsibility
"The market's up but your portfolio is down. But hey, don't worry...sometimes opposites attract!"
"First the good news...it's only money."
"My assets consist of a piggy bank, 2 teeth for the tooth fairy, and whatever change I find in the living room sofa."
Tags:money manager, money managers, financial advisor, financial advisors, financial adviser, financial advisers, wealth management, wealth, savings, life savings, save up, saves up, saving up, asset, assets, finance, finances, financial, investing, investments, income, personal wealth, annual income, child, stand, home business, home businesses