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"We study, we plan, we research. And yet, somehow, money still remains more of an art than a science."
'Money isn't making you happy. Instead of a low yield money market, have you tried putting it in high yield corporates?'
'There's been a slight devaluation.'
'Sorry, lad, but I lost all me gold during the recession. All I can give ya is a buck thirty in change!'
"It's great that you showed me how to get my 401K to roll over, but now it just plays dead."
"O. K., if it will increase market share."
'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'
'Stocks rose on news that there's no other place to put your money- after interest rates hit rock bottom.'
"IBM up 2 1/4, ATT down a 1/4,GM ... "
'And this just in from the stock market... buy, sell, buy, sell, buy, sell, buy!'
German Insider Trading
THe new 'Relaxed Economy' currency . . .
"Are you playing footsie with me?"
'I'm sorry Mr. Peterson, but we just can't accept your Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes letter as sufficient collateral.'
The dollar is in trouble.
'The dollar was down, the yen was up...but Michael Jordan autographed basketballs held steady.'
Stockmarket investor's trays 'Up' and 'Down'.
'That's why I love to live in the European Community - I got my pink slip in 18 different languages!'
The Crippled Euro
BUY NOTHING NOW - 'Must be your lucky day today, sir!''
'That was Dobson on the phone... What a lucky dog! He don't need to worry about stocks and economy anymore. He just went flat broke.'
STRIP Hambone: Money market warning indicator
"The markets seem to be a little jittery this morning."