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"I still enjoy running my winery, but these days my real passion is the meth lab."
"Listen, girl. Run into town and go to the sheriff's office. Then make a right. Find the liquor store and get a bottle of 2011 Napa. Do not get the Chilean Malbec you got last time. Hurry."
"If the weather stays good, we could end up in a very prestigious 1992 Cabernet Sauvignon."
"The drought here in California is so bad, we've gone from watering down our wine, to wining down our water."
'Yeah, we're in Napa Valley.'
'For the last time, no side trip to Napa Valley!'