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'So, Smith, how do you feel negotiations are going?'
"You'll have to phrase it another way. They have no word for 'fetch.' "
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"Would you like to hear about our retirement plan?"
Tags:businessman, businessmen, exec, execs, executive, executives, career, careers, big business, corporate, corporation, corporations, day job, offices, office job, modern life, modern world, working life, working world, desk job, desk jockey, interview, interviews, interview skills, employment, employ, employed, unemployed, salary, pay cut, cut, cuts, budget cut, budget cuts, undervalued, undersold, undersell, financial crash, negotiate, negotiation, negotiating, contract, contract dispute, contracts, benefit, benefits, cryo, cryofreeze, retirement, retirement plan, retirement plans, human resources
"I'm really excited about this opportunity, but I'm hoping there's room to negotiate the title? What about 'Rises-to-the-Occasions-Mary?', or 'Cool-Under-Pressure-Mary?'
Tags:mary, virgin mary, gabriel, angel gabriel, angel, angels, message from god, messages from god, nativity, nativity story, birth of christ, christianity, virgin, virginity, title, titles, job title, job titles, impressive job titles, embarrassing job titles, negotiate, negotiates, negotiation, promotion, opportunity, opportunities
"How much if I pedal?"
"Here's the deal, Kim. I pick up eggs and butter, but no dry cleaning."
Tags:broker, brokers, marriage, married life, husband, husbands, shopping, men, man, negotiate, negotiating, negotiation, negotiation skills, call, calls, wife, wives, groceries, grocery, home, housewife, grocery shopping, metropolitan, metropolitan life, urban life, urban, seedy, sleazy, businessman, businessmen, never off the clock, workaholic, work a holic, work-a-holic, work addiction, exec, execs, deal, deals, art of the deal, wheeler dealer, movie, movies, film, films, chores, chore, relationship, relationship building, relationships
Thanks to compromise they were moving closer.
'For the last time, it's called a 'win-win' contract. Nobody gets whacked.'
'It's simple, really - unless and until all our demands are met, we keep crying.'
"Butt out, Buster! Who the hell do you think you are-Jimmy Carter?"
Tags:butt out, butts out, butting out, haitian trip, haitian trips, haiti, jimmy carter, president, presidents, negotiate, negotiates, negotiating, negotiation, negotiations, mediate, mediates, mediating, fight, fights, fighting, bar fight, bar fights, faction, factions, peacemaker, peacemakers, peacemaking, settlement, settlements, international diplomacy, diplomacy, diplomat, diplomats, former president, former presidents, bosnia
"Some of us negotiate our contracts better than others."
At an impasse, facing a brick wall.
"It's agreed. I'll try to get the best of you and you'll try to get the best of me."
"I'm going to get you, Manhattan! I'm going to be one of the biggest things that ever hit this place! You just watch, Manhattan! You just watch!"
Tags:manhattan, wall street, new york, new york city, wall, walls, historical event, historical events, american history, dutch, trading company, trading companies, trading vessel, trading vessels, america, discovery, discoveries, colony, colonist, colonists, colonial, imperial, imperialist, imperialists, imperialism, negotiate, negotiates, negotiating, negotiation, negotiations
"I'm sorry, Chad, … if it's a subpoena I don't think I can negotiate an appearance fee."
Tags:subpoena, subpoenas, appearance, appearances, appearance fee, appearance fees, trial, trials, defense attorney, defense attorneys, attorney, attorneys, legal team, legal teams, celebrity trial, celebrity trial, celebrity trials, media frenzy, media frenzies, demand, demands, demanding, negotiate, negotiates, negotiating, negotiator, negotiators, demand, demands, demanding, fee, fees, entitled, entitlement, entitlement complex, entitlement complexes, actor, actors, acting
'Everything is negotiable, including my integrity.'
The Tooth Accountant
Tags:tooth fairy, tooth fairies, accountant, accountants, accounting, accounting firms, bitcoin, bitcoins, mutual fund, mutual funds, investment, investments, investor, investors, hedge fund, hedge funds, stockbroker, stockbrokers, broker, brokers, portfolio, stock market, stocks and bonds, stock, stocks, bond, bonds, negotiate, negotiating, negotiator, negotiators, long-term, long-term thinking, long-term thought, financial advisor, financial advisors, financial adviser, financial advisers
"Please, sir, I want it all."
Tags:office, offices, ol, corporate, pay, pay rise, contract, contracts, desk, desk jobs, oliver twist, dickensian, dickens, negotiate, negotiations, negotiating, employment, employee, employer, employers, job, jobs, work, working, worker, workers, please sir, can i have some more, woman, women, office lady, greed, greedy, greediness
"And for an extra fourteen hundred dollars I'll stop touching your arm."
Tags:car, cars, vehicle, vehicles, car lot, car lots, dealership, dealerships, care salesman, car salesmen, used car salesmen, used car salesman, used car, used cars, touch, touching, physical contact, space bubble, space invasion, invade, invasion, invasive, personal space, creepy, touchy, touchy-feely, extra, price, prices, negotiate, negotiating, deal, deals, sale, sales, sell, buy, buyer, buyers, customer, customers, money
'Well, er, could we negotiate?'
"828,000 square miles for $15 million -- as is?"
Tags:real estate, real estate agent, real estate agents, louisiana, louisiana purchase, thomas jefferson, jefferson, american history, history, historian, historians, historians, americanist, americanists, bargain, bargains, offer, offers, asking price, asking prices, negotiate, negotiates, negotiating, negotiation, negotiations, founding fathers, home buyer, home buyers
"Agreed. We'll reduce our arsenal of insults, jibes and grievances by one-third but will be permitted to stockpile them for use should the need arise."
Tags:therapist, therapists, therapy, counselor, counselors, counseling, counsellor, counsellors, counselling, insult, insults, insulting, jibe, jibes, grievance, grievances, petty, pettiness, bad relationship, bad relationships, mismatch, mismatches, mismatching, couple, couples, stockpile, stockpiles, stockpiling, save up, saves up, saving up, weapon, weapons, nuclear weapons, nuclear arsenal, nuclear arsenals, disagreement, disagreements, disagreeing, treaty, treaties, accord, accords, peace accord, peace accords, negotiate, negotiates, negotiating, negotiation, negotiations, peace, bicker, bickers, bickering, fight, fights, fighting, war, wars, warring, couple, couples
'That's your best advice? Play nice.'
'These upcoming negotiations are going to be rough Jekyll, son you better send Hyde.'
"You know what you're doing? Criminalizing policy differences."
Tags:policy, policy difference, policy differences, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, judgement, judgements, judgement day, judgment, judgments, judgment day, gates of heaven, st. peter, saint peter, appeal, appeals, appealing, appeal the decision, appeals the decision, appealing the decision, emotional appeal, emotional appeals, moral, morality, ethics, disagreement, disagreements, plea, pleas, plea deal, plea deals, plea bargain, plea bargains, bargain, bargains, bargaining, negotiate, negotiates, negotiating, negotiator, negotiators