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"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."
"I'm sorry, Louis. I need someone more Y2K-compliant."
'My new year's resolution was to delegate more...So I delegated managing massively increased demands with drastically reduced resources in a flat-lining economy to George.'
"That was fun- we should do New Year's more often."
"Spring is in the air but it's December in my ABS."
New Years Resolution.
"I'm serious about keeping my New Year's resolutions. In the past, my resolutions when in one year and out the other."
'I'm really serious about keeping my New Year's resolutions. In the past, my resolutions were always in one year and out the other.'
"I'm not wasting this year. I'm learning Catalan."
"In solidarity with everyone who is snowed in across the country, I'postponing my New Year's resolution to exercise."
Every year it's the same thing. I resolve to lose a ton and you say you're going to control your anger.
"Nope, no New Year's resolutions for me this year—I'm still working on a backlog dating from '87."
This year I thought I'd give up something different so I've given up writing Haiku poetry.
"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."
Good intentions last a month on average
New Year's resolutions only last for about a month
'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'
"I've finished my New Year's resolutions, and now I'm going to get a running start on yours."
"I'm giving up taking selfies for New Year."
"Well there goes the last of the NEW YEARS resolutions."
"I'm giving up giving up!"
"For New Year I've decided to give you up Gerald."