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'And how would you like your porridge, too hot, too cold, or just right?'
'I'll have the porridge...' 'That sounds terrible. I'll have the blueberry pancakes.'
Social media in fairy tales
'Hey, wanna hear something interesting?'
'Who's been eating my crystal meth?'
'Someone's been sitting in my cubicle!' 'Someone's been eating in my cubicle!' 'Someone's been sleeping in my cubicle!'
"Have you seen the use-by date on this porridge?"
Goldilocks discovers Father Bear's recliner.
IRS 'We'll have one long form, one short form, and one just-right form.'
Proof that Bears Do S**t In The Woods.
"She says she's got squatters rights."
Goldilocks suing the 3 bears
'I'm taking you off porridge.'
'And someone's been hacking into my online banking!'
Goldilocks's plan to try the same thing at the three panda's house backfires.
"I'm pushing for compensation. I burnt my mouth on your porridge."
'Blast that Goldilocks! Now your mother thinks she needs one of those fancy orthopaedic beds!'
'Blast this rise in girl crime!'
'A hacker named Goldilocks has entered our home page.'
'How come we never have porridge?'
Goldilocks and bears phone to complain about each other.
The Three Bears and Gridlock: The story of a family whose house was raided while they were stuck in traffic.
Sirens at the Goldilocks Emergency Equipment Store are labeled, 'Too loud,' 'Too Soft,' and 'Just Right.'
'She said we ought to have at least one portion of fresh fruit or vegetable with every meal.'
'To show support for Daddy's low cholesterol diet, we'll all be eating porridge for breakfast.'