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'I hope these make you feel better, because they're all you're getting.'
'...instead of giving him morphine for his kidney stones, they are testing the healing power of laughter.'
"I'd like some Ketamine for my appetizer. What opiate would you recommend for my entree?"
'We're all out of Novocain, so we need to restrain your arms and legs.'
Feel better and Feel less medicine.
"For the pain, these have proven to be the most effective swear words."
"Before we try assisted suicide, Mrs. Rose, let's give the aspirin a chance."
Tags:doctor, doctors, gp, general practitioner, general practitioners, gps, aspirin, pain killer, pain killers, pain relief, pain reliever, pain relievers, fever reducer, fever reducers, drug, patient, patients, jumping to conclusions, assisted suicide, death, murder, crimes, medical, medicine, medication, medications, medicines, med, meds, prescription, prescriptions, panic, panicking
'The anesthetic should be strong enough, but I've put this on just to be on the safe side.'
'Mother, are you sure your marijuana use is purely medicinal?'
"Take three thousand Tylenol and call me in the morning."
Tags:giant, giants, dosage, dosages, pain killer, pain killers, pain relief, doctor, doctors, md, mds, m.d.s, m.d., gp, gps, g.p.s, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, mythical creature, mythical creatures, under react, under reaction, medical check up, medical check ups, clinic, clinics, doctors clinic, doctors clinics, doctor's clinic, doctor's clinics, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments
'Two Aspirins'...'Brain Tumor'
'My chiropractor has made me feel so good, I thought it was time I got rid of my pills.'
'Enough acupuncture - get me a couple of aspirin.'
'Did I throw which spitball?'
The Annual Anesthesiologist Convention.
'Laughter's the best medicine, so laugh a lot during the day and take two aspirin at bed time.'
'First, let me give you something for the pain.'
"Take two aspirin and text me in the morning."
Tags:text, texts, text message, text messages, medication, medications, medicine, medicines, aspirin, aspirins, drug, diagnosis, diagnoses, diagnostic, diagnostics, gp, gps, physician, physicians, healthcare, health care, hypochondria, hypochondriac, hypochondriacs, modern life, modern lifestyle, modern lifestyles, pain killer, pain killers, minor malady, minor maladies
"That's just the meds kicking in."
'Take two asprin and stick your head in the the sand.'
"Will a local anesthesia work? I'm from out-of-town."
Tags:hospitals, hospital, local anesthetic, local anaesthesic, local anaesthesics, local anaesthesia, local anesthesia, pain killer, pain killers, painkiller, painkillers, medical procedure, surgical procedure, local anesthetics, doctors, doctor, patients, patient, medicine, medical, anesthesia, out-of-town, out of town, anaesthetist, anaesthetists, anesthetist, anesthetists
'According to the bottle, these are 24-hour pain reliever pills that will kill pain before you realize you're feeling pain, and. . .'
'He's getting a cold. . . He's not feeling well, Ma.'
"I don't prescribe opioids anymore, so have your bartender fill this prescription."