Search by Search ID or Tag or use the Advanced Search
'Thank you for your unsolicited parenting advice! In return, I'd like to tell you about a method I know for removing those unsightly age spots.'
"Dr. Spock sure has your number."
'Try cutting down on his cling peaches.'
'I read all the parenting books, but you always manage to stay one step ahead of me!'
A mom and baby reading 'How to Parent' and 'How to Baby.'
'Hang on. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Apparently that's not a good idea.'
'I think we all know who's running the show.'
"Am I doing something wrong? He won't even consider hibernating."
"The trick is to catch the bread they throw us in mid air: Otherwise, it gets all soggy and is not as nice..."
Parents, Please Don't Name Your Son 'Boxcar'.
'Parenting skills don't come naturally. You learn from the experience of screwing up your kids just like your parents did.'
"Today, I'm helping you understand teenage excuses. 'Why should I wash dishes?! I only used one fork!' Believe me, kids love that line."
"Studies show that during teen years...it's more important to focus on character issues rather than petty things like dirty rooms."
Initiate conversations with your child...even about sex and relationships."
"Don't listen to her! She's a cuckoo: what would she know about parenting?!"
Listen to your child and be patient.
"Can I can go to a party?"