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"For your comfort, you will be searched by someone of your own level of sexiness."
'There is a $15 baggage fee... a $15 airport improvement fee... a $15 full body scan fee... a $15 pat-down fee...'
"Before I accept you as my coach, I just need to check you're not wearing a wire-tap."
Working at the TSA...Pat-Down Fridays
"She's demanding to be patted down again."
'That security pat down was so invasive.'
"No, he's not a security risk ... he just loves the pat-downs."