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"'Article I. Section 9. Claus B. No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States' - we gotta change that."
'He calls himself a philanthropist, but would prefer Lord Philanthropist.'
'I said it's getting very noisely in here with all these new peers!'
'Well, our company has got a praiseworthy history. Dukes, Counts, members of the parliament, famous artists, leading industrialists... they already sued us!'
House of Lords reform - 'It needs reforming into a chamber of people who agree with me.'
Organ donation - 'I donated mine to the Labour party in return for a peerage.'