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"I'm not getting a flat-screen TV til something better comes along."
"Happy birthday, Judy. And for all the other employees born in October, November, December or any of the other months, happy birthday to you, too."
Dave And His Common-Law Accountant, Phil
"I'd just like to let you know that even in good times I'd let you get the check."
"How soon will this be a remnant
'How did your finger and thumb get so big?'
"Yes, I remember you. I recommend the house Merlot. It goes well with a bad tip."
"How many times are you going to try to fix that charger cable with duct tape? It's time to just buy a new one."
"Don't be alarmed. He faints every time he sees the bill."
"Dad can we stop pushing this backdrop and go on a real vacation?"
"Stop saying you're a fiscal conservative. You're just cheap!"
"Well, it's been nice. And obviously the £10 million win hasn't change you. . . . A mug of tea an' a couple garibaldies - as tight as ever!"
The Three Musketeers, while being noble and brave, were incredibly cheap.