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'Steroids are for weenies. Back in my day, they played baseball like real men. . . drunk and bloated.'
"Are you sure you used human growth hormone?"
"Luke, use to Force, or crush up the Adderall Chewbacca gave you and snort it – your call."
Post race drug test.
A boy lies on his bed surrounded by posters advertising performance enhancing drugs.
'There's more to life than winning. . .there's also testing negative for performance enhancing drugs.'
"Sosa's great, but McGwire is my hero."
'Get him tested. He's got to be taking some kind of performance enhancing drug.'
'Your drug test results show you aren't taking any performance enhancing drugs. Your performance review results shows that maybe you should.'
"Unfortunately, the urine test counted for half of the grade."
Stan read that high doses of caffeine can boost athletic performance.
"Lighten up, honey. You use performance-enhancing drugs!"
"So far, so good! And no one's wise to the performance enhancing drugs!"
'You dropped this!'
"How are you doing in your fantasy dopers' league?"
"No I don't use steroids. Why do you ask?"
"Oh that's Larry. He has a bad Russian athlete habit."
Tortoise V Hare Enquiry
"All these reports and rumours lack substance....unlike our athletes."
'It may not be a big deal now, but when your grandmother jumped over the moon, she did it without the help of any performance enhancing drugs.'
'The pitcher tested negative for steroids. The pitcher's mound we're not too sure about.'
'Felton, rumour has it you've been using performance enhancing drugs.'