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Pet a Puppy
"What is it with you guys in legal? The people in accounting rub my belly all the time!"
'Drop the can opener!'
Tags:cat, cats, feline, felines, police, policeman, policemen, officer, officers, cop, cops, law enforcement, pet, pets, petting, petted, can opener, can openers, tin opener, tin openers, gun point, gunpoint, freeze, freezes, freezing, order, orders, ordering, command, commands, commandingthe flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"Can you make it purr when I pet it?"
"When the battery run down you get out and pet it."
Tags:toy, toys, car, cars, toy car, toy cars, parent, parents, dad, dads, instruct, instructing, demonstrate, demonstrating, inform, informing, child, children, pet, pets, petting, break, breaks, break down, battery, dead battery, sarcastic, sarcasm, dad joke, dad jokes, confuse, confused, confusion, static electricity, renewable energy, green car, green cars, sustainable, sustainability, static charge, static shock
"They're most dangerous when you stop petting them."
'Does your dog bite?' 'Oh, please, please, please, boss, let me handle this one!'
"What happens if I keep petting him the wrong way over and over?", "Here, let me try!"
"Maybe we should just go ahead and have a kid."
Tags:childless couple, childless couples, cat, cats, pet, pets, petting, play, plays, put on a play, putting on a play, have a child, has a child, having a child, parent, parents, parenting, obsess, obsesses, obsessing, cat person, cat people, cat lover, cat lovers, replacement, replacements, biological clock, biological clocks
"Poke my bunny with a stick, sir?"
Tags:child, children, animal rights, animal welfare, animal rights activist, animal rights activism, animal right activism groups, rabbit, rabbits, bunny, bunnies, bunny rabbit, bunny rabbits, pet, pets, petting, animal abuse, inhumane, brutal, inhumane treatment, brutal treatment, money making, money maker, vendor, vendors, exploitation, exploit, exploitative, capitalism, capitalist, capitalists, commercialism, turning a blind eye, sales, sales tactic, street vendor, street vendors, child vendor, child vendors, curiosity, curious, sick curiosity, parents, parent, parenting, parenthood, insensitive, desensitised
'Does he bite?' - 'No, he swallows things whole.'
"Pickles, if you don't get off my lap, we're toast."
"Scratch my head, would you?"
Tags:dog, dogs, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, psychologist, psychologists, psychology, analyst, analysts, therapist, therapists, therapy, scratch my back, scratch, scratches, pet, pets, petting, therapy, itch, itches, itching, head-scratcher, head-scratchers, dog owner, dog owners, dog lover, dog lovers
Tags:dreaming, dream, dreams, sleep, sleeping, rest, resting, bedtime, bed, dreamers, butter side up, landing butter side up, toast, good toast, toast and butter, toothpaste, brushing teeth, toothpaste tube, empty toothpaste tube, dog, dogs, puppy, puppies, pup, pups, pet, pets, petting, dream small, petting dogs, dog lover, do lovers, unambitious, lack of ambition, live in the moment, living in the moment, life goal, life goals, achievable life goals, achievable, boring, boredom, boring person, boring people, feasible life goals, feasible, attainable, attainable life goals, little things, little thing, the little little things, the small things, small things
"He rubbed your belly and it felt good - that doesn't make you gay."
"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"
Tags:dog, dogs, puppy, puppies, wolf, wolves, table scrap, table scraps, belly rub, belly rubs, tummy rub, tummy rubs, politician, politicians, stump speech, stump speeches, political speech, political speeches, rally, rallies, political rally, political rallies, red meat, base, appealing to the base, emotional appeal, emotional appeals, pet, pets, petting
"Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we will finally determine who is the best pet-cat or dog."
"I like having my head scratched but what I really love is deep tissue massage."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking dog, talking dogs, dog, dogs, canine, canines, dog owner, dog owners, petting, head scratches, head scratching, massages, deep tissue massage, masseuse, masseuses, masseur, masseurs, massage therapist, massage therapists, massage therapy, pet massage, pet massages, health, fitness
'You wouldn't be very good at petting Dachshunds.'
'I guess you don't recognize me out of uniform. I work for Animal Control.'
'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'
"I didn't catch it, but I got the plates."
'No, I am not finished with the comics section, now give me back my glasses!'
"Oh, this is so cute... Fluffy likes you!"