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"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."
Tags:bedside manner, bed side manner, surgeon, surgeons, consultant, consultants, medical, hospital, hospitals, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, patient, patients, suffer, suffering, spiritual, listen, listens, sympathy, empathy, negligent, negligence, procedure, medical student, medical students, med student, med students, training, robotic, robotics, demeanor, demeanour, eye contact
'The NHS is committed to patients having control over their care...So if you'd like to check your symptoms online I'll be back later for a diagnosis and careplan.'
'No, no, no...that's far too legible. Shakier. Much shakier!'
A doctor runs away from a cellphone
"I have to ask you a few questions. I've written a screenplay. Would you read it?"
Tags:screenplay, screenplays, writer, writers, hollywood, actor, actors, director, directors, producer, producers, film, films, movie, movies, movie maker, movie makers, filmmaker, filmmakers, film maker, film makers, doctor, doctors, general practitioner, general practitioners, medical check up, medical check ups, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians
"I know the doctor said this is only a bad cold, but in case he's mistaken I'd like to hear side eight of 'Der Rosenkavalier' one last time."
"He's going to be fine. We're just putting his giblets back."
"You gave us quite a scare there Mr. Edwards! We thought we lost your credit card information."
Tags:medical problem, medical problems, bill, bills, medical bill, medical bills, medical insurance, health insurance, health cover, medical cover, credit card, credit cards, info, information, doctor, doctors, gp, gps, general practitioner, general practitioners, physician, physicians, health problem, health problems, medical scare, medical scares, bedside manner, bedside manners
"Trust me. I have a daytime emmy for this."
Tags:award, awards, award show, award shows, tv doctor, tv doctors, tv, tvs, television, televisions, tv show, tv shows, television show, television shows, actor, actors, acting, daytime tv, doctor, doctors, md, mds, m.d.s, m.d., gp, gps, g.p.s, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, medical check up, medical check ups, clinic, clinics, doctors clinic, doctors clinics, doctor's clinic, doctor's clinics, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians
"Those bullet holes are something new, aren't they?"
Tags:bullet, bullets, bullet hole, bullet holes, symptom, symptoms, health, health concern, health concerns, checkup, checkups, check-up, check-ups, appointment, appointments, concern, concerns, cause for concern, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, family doctor, observe, observes, observant, bedside manner, casual, casual attitude, gun crime, gun crimes, mass shooting, mass shootings, gun culture, examination, examinations, symptomatic, disease, diseases, ill, illness, illnesses
"A phony attorney…I'm so disappointed, son. Your brother is a phony doctor."
Tags:phony, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, nag, nags, nagging, jewish mother, mom, mom, mother, mothers, parent, parents, disappointment, disappointments, passive aggressive, passive-aggressiveness, fake, fakes, faking, faker, fakers, brother, brothers, ne'er do well, compare, compares, comparison, success, successful, con man, con men, con artist, con artists, con, cons, confidence man, confidence men, expectations, high expectations
Trump's Other Doctors
'I looked up my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead but I came in for a second opinion.'
"Your kidney is in a holding pattern over new jersey and should be here in two hours."
Tags:surgeon, surgeons, surgery, operation, operations, doctor, doctors, md, mds, m.d.s, m.d., gp, gps, g.p.s, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, hospital, hospitals, doctors appointment, doctors appointments, doctor's appointment, doctor's appointments, physician, physicians, kidney, kidneys, transplant, transplants, donor, donors, organ donor, organ donors
"With symptoms like yours, you could be the next Batman!"
Tags:symptom, symptoms, bat, bats, disease, diseases, medical practitioner, medical practitioners, ailment, ailments, superhero, superheroes, hero, heroes, comic book, comic books, signs, sign, test result, test results, diagnosis, diagnosed, medical diagnosis, g.p., general practitioner, general practitioners, gps, physician, physicians, physical appearance, deformity
'Take a look at the chart and tell me your pain level on a scale of 1 to 10.'
"You have Floral-Pattern baldness."
An aspiring magician as well as a top notch surgeon, Dr.Curmbott always tried the old tablecloth trick after each operation.'
"Hey, I've operated on this guy before—there are my initials."
Tags:operation, operations, operating, operating room, operating rooms, medical procedure, medical procedures, sign, signs, signing, signature, signatures, autograph, autographs, autographing, malpractice, medical malpractice, lawsuit, lawsuits, calling card, calling cards, surgeon, surgeons, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, uncaring, hospital, hospitals, hospitalized
"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."
Tags:tmi, too much information, overshare, oversharing, over-share, over-sharing, overshares, over-shares, waiter, waiters, waitress, waitresses, server, servers, customers, odd customers, customer service, engineer, engineers, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, gastroenterologist, dining out, food, meal, meals, dining, restaurant, restaurants, good meal, foodie, foodies, fine dining, eating out, happy customer, happy customers, food critic, food critics, food criticism, food review, food reviewer
Subway Lawyer meets Subway Doctor
Tags:subway, subways, subway ad, subway ads, lawyer, lawyers, attorney, attorneys, defense attorney, defense attorneys, representation, ambulance chaser, ambulance chasers, ambulance chasing, lawsuit, lawsuits, frivolous lawsuit, frivolous lawsuits, doctor, doctors, quack, quacks, remedy, remedies, crossover, crossovers, physician, physicians, meeting, meetings, meeting of the minds
"I don't think you're getting enough stress."
Tags:stress, stress out, stressed out, stressing out, stressor, stressors, doctor's orders, relax, relaxation, doctor's advice, doctors advice, advice, order, orders, worry, worries, worrying, worrier, worriers, anxious, anxiousness, anxiety, anxieties, medical advice, physician, physicians, doctor, doctors, healthy living
"Does it hurt when my attorney does this?"
'I've already diagnosed myself on the web but I thought I'd come in for a second opinion.'
'I want to biopsy that growth, Mr. Johnson. I don't like the looks of it.'