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"I know it's made of tofu, Paul, but you're missing the point."
"Don't tell anybody, but just bring me some mac and cheese instead."
'Mom, that's not fair! Dad got an apple and I don't!'
Pig to other: 'What an honor. I'm being roasted tomorrow by City Hall.'
'Check out the rack on this hot babe.'
'That reminds me - we're having a pig roast next Saturday!'