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'It's a bird, it's a plane...it's superman! Oh brother, a bird and a plane aren't even close to the same size...I really need some new glasses.'
The latest innovation in air travel: convertible jets.
'Any restrictions on the amount of luggage you can lose?'
'I'm not saying you wouldn't try to do the right thing in an emergency, it's just. . . look at your freaky little arms.'
'I'm sorry captain, he called shotgun...Got us on a technicality.'
Unfortunate Sky Diving Partner.
'Grandpa is showing us how they sent a text when he was a kid.'
"LaGauardia, and hurry - I've got a flight in six hours."
Tags:lagauardia, traffic jam, traffic jams, traffic queue, traffic queues, flight, flights, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airplane, airplanes, plane, planes, flight, flights, traffic, congestion, taxi, taxis, commute, commutes, airport, airports, taxi cab, taxi cabs, stuck in traffic, businessmen, businessman
World's sma.... llest beach
'You're charging me for TWO seats; an extra fee for my trunk, and now you've stopped giving out peanuts!...and you call yourself a JUMBO jet.'
An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.
Tags:flight, flights, cockpit, cockpits, pilot, pilots, engineer, engineers, engine drive, engine drivers, train driver, train drivers, train, trains, conductor, conductors, captain, captains, plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, ominous, worry, worries, fear, fears
"For People Who Enjoy Everything About Flying Except Being 30,000 Feet Up In The Air, There's The WIDE -BODY TRIAN!"
Tags:train, trains, plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airliner, airliners, flight, flying, scared, transport, transportation, amenities, pointless, unhelpful, useless, pointless, unwanted, unneeded, travel, travels, travelling, comfort, comforts, experience, experiencing, experiences, experienecd, critical, critique, parody, parodies
"It's mine—and I'd appreciate your not looking out of it."
Tags:airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, air travel, flying, plane, planes, passenger, passengers, seat, seats, window seat, windows seats, window, windows, travel, traveling, travelling, traveler, travelers, traveller, travellers, look out, look, looking, mine, possessive, greedy, greed, selfish, controlling, neighbour, neighbours, neighbor, neighbors
"At this time, we'd like to begin boarding our 'It's all about me' members."
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, traveling, travellers, travellers, travelling, passenger, passengers, boarding, announcement, announcements, member, members, membership, narcissism, narcissist, narcissists, ego, egotistic, egoist, egoists, egotistical, vain, vanity, selfish, self-centered, self-centred, modern line
"Book me, seat me, treat me bad."
Tags:airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flight, flights, passenger, passengers, customer service, customer services, customer satisfaction, airport, airports, air travel, customer experience, customer experiences, booking, bookings, unhappy customers, dissatisfied customer, dissatisfied customers
"Now boarding-all the people who pushed their way in front of the people supposed to be boarding."
Tags:queue, queuing, queues, queued, pushing, queue jumping, queue jumped, board, boarding, plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplanes, aeroplane, steward, stewardess, stewards, stewardesses, passenger, passengers, pushing, pushed, push, airport, airports, board, luggage, bag, bags, wait, waiting, line, waiting in line, order, orders, skip, skip the queue
A passenger on a plane watches as a truck labeled "Lostluggage.com" drives away from the plane he is on.
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, luggage, baggage, bag, bags, lost, lost & found, lost and found, truck, trucks, lorry, lorries, problem, problems, customer service, service, modern life, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, traveling, travelling
'Dang! Crashed again! Oh well... I've got to get to my flight.'
Tags:pilot, pilots, airport, airports, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, video game, video games, arcade game, arcade games, crash, crashes, crashed, crashing, fly, flies, flight, flights, worry, worries, worrying, worried, flight simulator, flight simulators, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"Mommy's not home. Mommy's on a plane ride with Captain Yummy!"
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, father, fathers, dad, dads, family, families, relationship, relationships, relationship issues, relationship problems, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, infidelity, cheater, cheaters, extramarital affairs, affair, affairs, dating, plane, planes, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, pilot, pilots, captain, captains, flight, flights, not home, modern life
"I try to do my part."
Tags:recycling, recycle, jet, jets, airplane, private jet, private jets, jet airplane, plane, planes, trash, trashes, rubbish, bin, bins, trashcan, trash can, flying, wealth, wealthy, rich, high society, environmental, environmentalism, eco friendly, eco-friendly, irony, ironic, millionaire, millionaires, billionaire, billionaires, climate, climate change, waste, zero waste, zerowaste, carbon emissions, green house gases, greenhouse gases, reduce, reduce reuse recycle
Father Christmas stuck on plane wing
"Must you precede everything you say with 'This is your captain speaking'?"
Tags:airport, airports, airline, airlines, pilot, pilots, plane, planes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airplane, airplanes, captain, captains, annoying habit, annoying habits, work/life balance, life/work balance, life-work balance, work-life balance, career, careers, taking our work home with you, bringing your work home with you, workaholic, workaholics
"Of course, you get two bags of peanuts."
Tags:airport, airports, airtravel, flying, flight, plane, planes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, airplane, airplanes, airline, airlines, peanuts, extra peanuts, extra seat, airplane seats, obesity, obese, flying while obese, two seats, obesity policy, obesity policies, fat, fat people, fat shame, plus size, plus size travellers
'You can relax now, ladies and gentlemen, , , we're through all of that rough turbulence,'
Just married - and we're rich!