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"Stinking politicians and their dirty laundry!" "That's Bob. He's watching 'CSPIN', again."
"A newspaper has a responsibility to ensure that its readers are fully informed."
"He's been watching too much TV. He said his first word - 'Trump'."
'Anything out of range of political commentators?'
"If they shorten political campaigns, what will we do for entertainment?"
"Don't feel bad, Boy. No one can understand politics these days."
"You have repetitive stress injury from saying 'I'm glad when this election is over'."
The Complain About the Election Channel
'Why are you watching politics?"
". . . And this has a chip that blocks out anything about politics."
"Al's gone from apolitical to apoplectic in one election cycle."
"Spotted any more left-wing bias?"
"We've got it all covered...the cricket, the tennis, the soccer and the other one is for Team Australia."
'It's congress fighting over the debt ceiling.'
'It doesn't matter if you're right or wrong: it's how much face time you get in the news cycle.'
"And now, a breaking story on blatant media bias. Reporting live from Washington, a radical, conservative hack."
"Elections, elections, elections! I'm sick of it! If I could vote, I'd vote for someone who would ban nonstop coverage of elections."
"Don't be scared, son, they're not real politicians."
"Watching the political debate, are you, Dear?"
"We love watching you. Your planet is our favorite reality show."
"It ain't over until NPR says it's over!"