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'You mean you want good communication and competent service?'
'Always give a grave prognosis, my boy!...'
'Now here, directly beneath the operating room, is our necropsy room.'
'By golly, Fenwick, we're going to just TAKE some time off!'
'That machine gives updates on liability insurance.'
'No, I've never worked for a veterinarian before, but I'm an active antivivisectionist.'
'Would I be selling flea powder if I could afford to invest in the stock market?'
Practice Limited to Freeze-Dried Pets
"Partnerships work well if you know how to get along."
'The most precious thing a practitioner can accomplish, my boy, is to accumulate a devoted following of these damned hypochondriacs."
'KEEPING UP in practice simply means knowing which drug the FDA has withdrawn.'
'I believe in delegating nonprofessional duties. In my place the technicians sell the leashes and rubber bones!'
'I'm sorry about the limp, but I now limit my practice to nutrition. Would you like to buy some dog food?"
'He's a brilliant diagnostician, but he has a lousy personality...
'These efficiency experts are ruining the pharmaceutical industry....'
'We've decided that Brownie has a foreign body in his paw....'
'Got to raise the price of dog food again! Income's down from last year."
'I'm selling leashes and collars again, to survive the competition....
'Where should I put the proctoscope, Doctor?'
'Now here's a practice-building therapeutic diet...
'Melvin, you have so much lead in your pants you don't need an apron....
'Oh! How nice! An espresso machine!'
'The increasing popularity of the Saint Bernard...'
'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'
'Physiology! Pharmacology! Bacteriology! Anatomy!...'