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"If I have to ask permission for every bite, dearest, we'll be mating all day."
Tags:relationship, relationships, consent, consenting consents, feminism, feminists, feminist, #metoo, metoo, me too, mantis, praying mantis, praying mantises, mantises, mate, mates, consensual, permission, reproduction, insect, insects, animal, animals, decapitate, relationship, relationships, death, dying, died
'Do you promise to love her in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, until one day she decides to bite off your head and eat you.'
',,,But if I do eat them I'll lose my child support, Oh, Alice,divorce is so hard,'
"After we have sex but before I kill you, I'm going to need your help with some shelves."
Tags:praying mantis, praying mantises, manual labor, manual labour, kill, kills, killing, killings, killer, killers, murder, murders, murdering, murderer, murderers, insect, insects, entomology, entomologist, entomologists, married life, marriage, marriages, married lives, useful, techincal, shelving, shelving unit, shelving units, assemble, assembles, assembling, assembly, shelves, build, builds, handyman, handymen
"Whoa! Wrong bar?"
Tags:praying mantis, praying mantises, mantis, mantises, drinking hole, drinking holes, drinker, drinkers, bar, bars, pub, pubs, insect, insects, bug, bugs, wildlife, drinking companion, drinking companions, drinking buddy, drinking buddies, discrimination, prejudice, rough crowd, rough crowds, bar brawl, bar brawls, bar fight, bar fights
"I hope you're not looking for a long-term relationship there, big boy. Because I'm probably gonna eat your head later."
Tags:date, dates, insect, insects, praying mantis, praying mantises, mate, mates, mating behaviour, mating behaviours, mating behavior, mating behaviors, entomology, entomologist, entomologists, long-term relationships, one night stand, one night stands, bug, bugs, short-term relationship, short-term relationships
"Mmm, this casserole is lovely, Marge! Which ex-husbands did you make it from, anyway?"
"So Dave - did you get lucky? Dave....? Dave...?"
"If you don't mind, before I eat you, I'd like to say prayer for world peace."
"Looks like someone got lucky."
'Dear god, please send flies.'
"I hate these dating sites. What ever happened to meeting a guy on a shrub, laying a couple hundred eggs, and then biting off his had while he's watching sports center.'
Tags:ideal man, ideal men, ideal, ideals, perfect, perfection, perfect man, perfect men, praying mantis, praying mantises, mantis, mantises, insect, insects, mate, mates, kill, kills, killing, killer, killers, murder, murders, murderer, murderers, man-eater, man-eaters, man-eating, eat, eats, eating, chew, chews, chewing, animal kingdom
'I'm an atheist.'
The real reason the female mantis devours the male.
'Haven't they been answered yet?'
'It's a nice day. Why don't you two go out and pray.'
'Mum, how come I don't have a daddy?'
"He's handsome. I wonder how he tastes?"
Tags:praying mantis, mantis, praying mantises, mantises, bugs, bug, insects, insect, entomologists, entomology, entomologist, online dating, dating site, dating sites, date, dates, computer dating, internet dating, internet dating site, internet dating sites, blind date, blind dates, single life, anticipation, anticipates, anticipating, first date, first dates, getting to know you
"Okay, don't bite my head off."
Tags:mantis, mantises, praying mantis, praying mantises, mate, mates, mated, bite, bites, biting, head off, don't bite my head off, biting my head off, bites my head off, household chore, household chores, trash duty, trash duties, garbage duty, division of labor, divisions of labor, divisions of labour, divisions of labour, gender difference, gender differences
'Your eating in bed is really getting out of hand.'
'Men! Oh, sure. . . they always want to hook up but they don't want to stick around to be eaten alive afterward. . . am I right, ladies?'
"You have your father's eyes."
"My fellow mantises...I can barely believe this, but it has come to my attention that there is a lack of prayer in this church!"
'We have praying mantises. They're good for the garden as long as they don't pray for the spinach.'