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Love Thy Neighbor
The Itsy-Bitsy Motivational Spider,
'And he said, Come unto me, for it's not what you know, but who you know.'
"And the Lord said, 'They shall gradually, so as not to cause unemployment, beat their swords into plowshares.'"
Tags:defense budget, defense budgets, military budget, military budgets, budget cut, budget cuts, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, military industry, military industrial complex, military industrial complexes, unemployment, unemployment rate, unemployment rates, cut, cuts, cutting, cut costs, cuts costs, cutting costs, slash the budget, slashes the budget, slashing the budget, religious right, clergy, clergyman, clergymen, preach, preaches, preaching, bible story, bible stories
'Wait a minute Rabbi, I thought you said Judaism wasn't all black and white.'
"Could you all please just listen to my sermon instead of asking me what I would do?"
Tags:jesus, preach, preaches, preacher, preachers, religious leader, religious leaders, advice, opinion, opinions, action, actions, christian, christians, christianity, sermon, sermons, oration, orations, listen, listens, teaching, teachings, lesson, lessons, question, questions, ask, asks, asking, stressed out, hands up, life advice
'I know you haven't seen me.. your last sermon was so good, it lasted me an entire year!'
"I have a feeling the preacher isn't well prepared this morning."
Tags:pastor, pastors, preacher, preachers, preaches, preaching, church, prepares, preparing, prepared, preparation, churches, christian, christians, christianity, god, jesus, sermon, sermons, teaching, teachings, hymn, hymns, note, notes, guide, guides, organise, organises, organised, organize, organizes, organized, priest, priests
Jesus is a socialist.
First Church: Thy shalt not blog against thy neighbor.
The Big Bang - Preachers.
'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'
'It's true! He does move in mysterious ways.'
"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."
Tags:jesus, seeker friendly, seeker friendly church, seeker sensitive church, evangelical, evangelicals, evangelizing, evangelize, evangelizes, church, churches, new media, social media, social network, social networks, social networking, preach, preaches, preaching, preachers, preacher, heaven, bible, biblical, new testament, disciple, disciples, convert, converts, conversion, conversions
'I really can't think of a blessed thing to preach about this morning, so I'll entertain questions from the floor.'
Preaching from the New Western Consumerist Version of the Bible.
"I wonder if he's talking to me?"
Tags:sermon, sermons, sunday sermon, sunday sermons, preach, preaches, preaching, homily, homilies, preacher, preachers, churchgoer, churchgoers, christian, christians, catholic, catholics, protestant, protestants, church, churches, church attendance, church attendant, pew, pews, audience, audiences, personal, personally
'Before you can love your enemy, you gotta make one.'
'With the possible exception of my husband, we all enjoyed your sermon, Reverend.'
Clerical Training Course - 'Gentlemen, we are here to practise what we preach.'
'Is this guy serious?'
'I don't know. I woke up with it after preaching last weeks sermon.'
Preaching to the inverted.
"Uh-oh! Here comes trouble!"
'Here's the story of the sermon on the mount.'