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'Oh, for heaven's sake What kind of ridiculous thing did you put on your facebook now, Jake'
'What this business really needs now is some credibility...so let's start with 1,000 social media followers, how much will that set us back??'
Although gravity had taken its toll Connie, she had devised a way to look youthful...
"I lied in my ad. I hate Wallace Stevens."
Tags:poet, poets, poetry, poem, poems, lie, lies, white lie, white lies, personal ad, personal ads, profile, profiles, dating profile, dating profiles, online profile, online profiles, date, dates, well-read, ad, ads, modern poet, modern poets, modern poetry, wallace stevens, pose, poses, poseur, poseurs, pretend, pretending, pretentious, pretentiousness, writer, writers, author, authors
'And number five said in his profile that he was 6'2' and he turned out to be 5'7'.'
Tags:online date, online dating, online dates, lie, lies, lying, liar, height, heights, head, heads, hunter, hunters, hunt, hunts, hunting, trophy, trophies, memento, mementos, remember, remembers, reminisce, reminisces, profile, profiles, online, on line, internet date, internet dating, close to home
"You look just like your profile picture."
Tags:relationship, relationships, dating, date, dates, online dating, internet dating, dating online, dating on the internet, dating website, dating websites, dating site, dating sites, profile, profiles, profile photo, profile photos, profile picture, profile pictures, social network, social networks, social networking, look, looking, similar, same, cat, cats, anthropomorphic, cat lady, cat ladies, animal, animals
'It seems we've both been a bit imaginative in creating our online profiles.'
You can also follow me on social media websites.
"You have excellent academic credentials and a wonderful work history but we try not to profile people."
Tags:interview, interviews, job interview, job interviews, cv, curriculum vitae, job application, job applications, profile, profiles, profiling, judge, judging, judgement, prejudge, prejudging, credentials, good credentials, work history, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, recruitment officer, recruitment officers
'So I looked at your Facebook page...oh man...there's no way you're getting this job!'
Musical notes F-A-C-E between lines on musical scale
'Joey, what have I told you? If you can't say something nice, post it on a social media platform.'
'You know, it's a lot easier to just follow me on twitter.'
"I'm not talking about your Abominable Snowman, mister—I'm talking about that diamond tiara!"
Tags:abominable snowman, yeti, yetis, bigfoot, smuggle, smuggles, smuggling, smuggler, smugglers, tiara, tiaras, diamond, diamonds, jewel, jewels, jewelry, jewellery, airport, airports, airport security, customs, customs officer, customs officers, u.s. customs, suspicious, suspiciousness, profile, profiles, profiling, valuable, valuables, crown, crowns
'Doc, I keep boring people with every minute detail of my life! I'm afraid I might have a bad case of the Twitters!'
"The women on these dating sites don't seem to believe I'm a prince."
Tags:prince, princes, online dating, dating, online, internet, internet dating, scam, scams, scammer, catfish, catfishing, catfisher, catfishers, cat-fishing, cat-fish, cat-fisher, cat-fishing, fake, false, profile, profiles, date, women, woman, butler, butlers, dating site, dating sites, dating app, dating apps, relationship, relationships, looking for a partner, modern life, match, matches, too-good-to-be-true, too good to be true, unrealistic
'My Facebook profile pic is my face Photoshopped onto a heavier person's body. That way I look thinner in person.'
'I love our nights in together, just you, me and our 756 friends.'
Tags:internet, web, www, ebnlinay, bidding, bids, auction, online auction, shopping, shop, mother, father, son, daughter, friends, social, social network, network, networking, social networks, social networking, bid, auctions, profile, profiles, social media, friend, friends, friendship, friendships, modern times, modern life
'It's the book everyone's talking about.'
Tags:wedding, weddings, bride, brides, bridegroom, bridegrooms, groom, grooms, selfie, selfies, self portrait, self portraits, narcissism, narcissist, narcissists, narcissistic, wedding photo, wedding photos, wedding photograph, wedding photographs, modern life, modern-life, selfie culture, wedding photographer, wedding photographers, memories, post, posts, social media, profile, profiles, status update, status updates
'On Facebook, no one knows I'm a yeti.'
'It's a pleasure to meet you sir. Facebook has told me so much about you.'
Tags:social networking, social network, social networks, employees, website, websites, privacy, privacy setting, privacy settings, profile, profiles, internet, social media, boss, employer, employee, meet, meeting, greeting, office, business, manager, personal information, spy, spies, spying, private information, privacy
'Mr. Anon! I recognise you from your avatar.'
Tags:marriage, weddings, wedding day, wedding days, statuses, social network, social networks, social networking, marital status, married, marry, wedding, preacher, priest, vow, vows, status, status update, update, internet, vicar, vicars, minister, bride, brides, groom, grooms, profile, profiles, online profile, online profiles, updates, updating, mobile, mobiles, mobile phone, mobile phones, modern life, modern times, millennial, millennials
'We no longer look at résumés. We go straight to your Facebook page.'