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'I'm not gonna lie to you. . . They all seem geometrically identical to me.'
"They say underwater is the next Brooklyn."
''Deceptively Spacious'? Well, er, that basically means that if it looks any bigger than a broom cupboard then your eyes are deceiving you!'
"Now this apartment will be vacant October 1st - "
Tags:empty apartment, empty apartments, apartment, apartments, property viewing, property viewings, landlord, landlords, rental, rentals, rental property, rental properties, privacy, tenant, tenants, tenancy, intrusion, intrusions, privacy, bath, baths, interruption, interruptions, house viewing, house viewings, estate agent, estate agents, real estate, super, supers, building superintendent, building superintendents
"Just think - if it really was 'unlivably small', would they have installed a permanent ping-pong table?"
Tags:ping-pong table, ping-pong tables, ping-pong, ping pong, ping pong table, ping pong tables, estate agent, estate agents, real estate, estate agency, realtor, realtors, property market, housing market, housing markets, property markets, small, flat, flats, apartment, apartments, property viewing, property viewings, house viewing, house viewings, living space, living spaces, small space, small spaces
'And the 4th bedroom?'
'Rising damp? Nah! That's our Nan with her pot of tea. Terrible hiccups always. . .'
"It has tremendous possibilities."
'Any risk of flooding.'
'That's not subsidence. That's land rising up on either side.'
'At least this means we won't need a coal mining search.'
"You see a haunted house, I see a house with good bones."
Tags:estate agent, estate agents, estate agency, property viewing, property viewings, house viewing, house viewings, house market, house markets, housing market, property market, haunted house, haunted houses, sales spiel, sales spiels, sales pitch, sales pitches, spirit, spirits, positive spin, positive spins
"They say underwater is the next Brooklyn."
Tags:real estate, estate agent, estate agents, estate agency, realtor, realtors, sales pitch, sales pitches, sales-pitch, sales-pitches, for sale, land prices, land price, property viewing, property viewings, property market, housing market, housing markets, property markets, property developer, property developers, up and coming, up-and-coming, neighbourhood, neighbourhoods, neighborhood, neighborhoods
Tags:husband, husbands, wife, wives, married life, married couple, married couples, marital problem, marital problems, divorce, divorces, divorcing, real estate, property market, property markets, estate agent, estate agents, estate agency, property viewing, property viewings, wife selling, wife-selling
Commercial Real Estate
Tags:real estate, estate agent, estate agents, estate agency, property viewing, property viewings, open home, open homes, open house, home, home owner, property owner, property sale, selling itself, property development, homes, for sale, sale, building, commercial, ad, ads, sponsor, advertising, marketing, advert, adverts, marketer, marketers
"This home has everything...a pool, gym, sauna and even a holding cell for the kids or in-laws."
Tags:real estate, holding cell, holding cells, dungeon, dungeons, prison, prisons, prisoner, prisoners, estate agent, estate agents, property viewing, property viewings, mansion, mansions, real estate agent, real estate agents, in-law, in-laws, in law, in laws, family home, family homes, selling point, selling points
"This house has everything on your wish-list: Made of candy, extra-large oven, close to parks and schools... Shall we look inside?"
Tags:realtor, realtors, real estate, property agent, property agents, property viewing, property viewings, wicked witch, wicked witches, selling point, selling points, property market, housing market, fairytale, fairytales, fairy story, fairy stories, fairy tale, fairy tales, witch, witches, hansel and gretel, extra crispy
"How much are you selling your hedge for?"
"And it's in a great neighborhood, lots of fire hydrants and no squirrels!"
Tags:fire hydrant, fire hydrants, squirrel, squirrels, dog house, dog houses, doghouse, doghouses, pet, pets, pet dog, pet dogs, dog owner, dog owners, canine, canines, property viewing, property viewings, house viewing, house viewings, good neighbourhood, good neighborhood, estate agent, real estate, estate agents
"The apartment comes with a roommate, but she's mostly nocturnal."
Tags:apartment, apartments, roommate, roommates, rodent, rodents, rat, rats, room mate, room mates, room-mate, room-mates, nocturnal, nocturnal animal, nocturnal animals, roomie, roomies, pest, pest control, pest controls, vermin, vermin control, vermin controls, exterminator, exterminators, rat problem, rat problems, infestation, infestations, infested, real estate, realtor, realtors, property viewing, property viewings, real estate
"It's true that the basement's flooded, but it's stocked."
'Probably left here my the decorators, as I was saying, the roof is watertight.'
"Great location. Let's check it out."