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"We are Protest-ants!"
'I see the marching season's over for the year.'
'Here's the state of the art gym, here's the coffee bar and internet cafe ... oh, yeah - and this little thing over here is the new sanctuary.'
1651: Cromwell bans Christmas
Tags:mother in law, mother-in-law, oliver cromwell, christmas, christmases, puritan, puritans, protestant, protestants, festive spirit, festive period, festive season, christmas spirit, xmas spirit, puritan ban, puritan bans, cancel, cancel, cancelling, family life, family-life, extended family, elizabeth cromwell, parliamentarians, roundheads, civil war
Northern Ireland Garden Centre - Seeds of Democracy: Might not blossom.
'Mama! Joey's calling me a white Anglo-Saxon Protestant again!'
"Where are the green cones? We're not all Protestants, you know."
'Could those 10 commandments be dumbed down to one short catchy jingle?'
Power sharing tools - Electric drills having a stand off.
"Darling, I can't start the fire. Can I throw on a couple of heretics?"
"You can't be a St. Bernard - you're Lutheran."
Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.
Tags:church, churches, pastor, pastors, priest, priests, reverend, reverends, sermon, sermons, homily, homilies, christian, christians, christianity, catholic, catholics, protestant, protestants, now serving, sign, signs, signage, holy man, holy men, man of god, men of god, church leader, church leaders
"I wonder if he's talking to me?"
Tags:sermon, sermons, sunday sermon, sunday sermons, preach, preaches, preaching, homily, homilies, preacher, preachers, churchgoer, churchgoers, christian, christians, catholic, catholics, protestant, protestants, church, churches, church attendance, church attendant, pew, pews, audience, audiences, personal, personally
John panics as he realizes being first to put money in the offering means people will know how much he gave.
Tags:church, church collection, church collection, collection basket, collection baskets, collection, collections, churchgoer, churchgoers, church goer, church goers, offering, offerings, church offering, church offerings, church offering basket, church offering baskets, catholic, catholics, protestant, protestants, comparison, comparisons, shame, shames, shaming, panic, panics, panicking
Martin Luther was a pioneer of self-publishing.
Tags:book, books, self-publisher, self-publishing, self publisher, self publishing, self-publishers, self publishers, pioneer, innovate, innovates, innovater, innovaters, innovator, innovators, innovation, innovations, martin luther, protestant, protestantism, protestants, pioneers, pioneering, religious revolution, religious revolutions, revolution, protestant reformation, lutherism, 95 theses, ninety-five theses, ninety five theses, disputation on the power of indulgences
Martin Luther's 96th Thesis
"Good news! We're moving to the Bible belt!"
Tags:pilgrim, pilgrims, bible belt, evangelical, evangelicals, protestant, protestants, protestantism, christian, christians, puritan, puritans, social conservative, conservative, religious conservative, religious conservatives, hq, hqs, headquarter, headquarters, corporate office, corporate, move, moves, moving
'I'm afraid neither of my parents are at home... Are they Dad? '
"Maybe we should change the name of the parish to something cool, like the Protestants do and add a coffee bar."
Tags:coffee, coffees, coffee bar, coffee bars, protestant, protestants, parishioner, parishioners, protestantism, congregation, congregations, catholic, catholics, catholicism, roman catholic, roman catholics, parish, parishes, church, churches, vicar, vicars, priest, priests, minister, ministers, pr, public relations
"Boy, the sooner she realises the only authority I obey is the Bible, the better!"
Absalon's bad hair day.
'Every Lent it's the same-I've nothing to give up!'
'So what's this future you have in mind, young Murgatroyd - pantomime?'