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"Okay, Jaxcsunn, stay still in the crystal circle while I douse you in essential oils."
"Oh my God! Tinyfoot does exist!"
"I'm attempting to transmute calcium oxide, copper gluconate, manganese sulfate, tyrosine and benzaldehyde into condensed soup."
"Is it gold yet?"
"He has a little place in the basement where he's trying to transmute amethysts into antibiotics."
"And he had it peer-reviewed by his fellow pseudoscientists."
"Of course you can't replicate my experiments. That's the beauty of them."
"After all these years, I'm sure of only one thing: when I heat the liquid, it boils."
"I'm feeling nostalgia for when your mother rubbed butter on them."
The Algenist Meets the Alchemist...