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Moses' Reading Glasses
'What do you mean for reading only. . . ? Put them on, you've got a family to feed!!'
"These reading glasses aren't working. I still can't see the book!"
"Nice reading glasses."
You know your getting old when you have to put on your reading glasses to trim your eyebrows...
"My grandma needs reading glasses to read. I guess they only taught writing and 'rithmetic back in her day."
Fly reading glasses
"Lost" socks are not accepted into society until after they have stolen a pair of your reading glasses.
'I bought a wireless, reading glasses locator, but I can't find it without my glasses.'
'Have you got any idea where I left my glasses?'
"I'm sorry I didn't find your wallet but I found six pairs of reading glasses!"
"Yes thanks, these are a comfortable reading distance for me!"
'No, I need my glasses-for-finding-my-other-glasses glasses.'
'Mabel, you know you have to lay up with my reading glasses for alphabet soup...'
"Why are we getting 'Old Spooky' spectacles for his birthday?" -- "So he can read his correct date of birth!!"