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"I'm getting a little itchy to redo the bedroom!"
Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.
"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."
Changing house name.
'I knew we shouldn't have got 'changing rooms' in to refurbish the surgery.'
"Well, we're down to bare brick, natural wood, and raw nerves."
"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."
"We're here to tile your bathroom floor."
'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'
When Papi says..."I can fix that! Wood is comfortable when it's covered with cushions!" it means...he's too cheap to buy a new couch.
'Wider! I told you, this is the office of the CEO!'
'Bank Improvement Loans'
Gravestone inscription: Norman P. Mulroony, Retooling in Peace.
"And then someone said, 'Hey, why not just put them all in their own department?' It was a stroke of utter genius!"